More eXCIting Snark to Durp
 

Some things you can't leave to Fenris.

Other things you can--yo, @Fenris, could you please go close down the other one? :thumbs:

Yay! :confetti:

Second!

I try harder.

Third. I don't try hard at all. :D

Fourth. I'm a lazy mofo!

Sixth. I'm lazy and can't count.

Fifth. Who knew alphabeting could be so complicated.

I can count to potato!

Not the worst thread title I've ever seen.

hi

I reported Siam Sam for being gross in the Boy Scouts Accept Girls thread (making a joke about eating a Brownie. hurrrrr) I think he moved back to the states from Bangkok and he's not seeing enough depravity anymore and needs his fix.

I also reported dropzone last week for getting all drooly over Jennshark when she was talking about how her pants made her look like she had a boner. Ever since dude's wife died and Dopers told him it's ok to start dating, he's become pretty lecherous on the boards, letting anyone who listens know that he really likes women and women really like him and he probably likes you and if there's a Dopefest he'll come visit you!

I hope the mods are reaching out to these fools. I don't want to be associated with a board that lets such utter grossness go on, and I'm not leaving.

:driveby:

I'm with JJ

Link to dropzone a buffoonishness?

I would have banned Siam Sam for that joke without a second thought or any chance of reprisal.

With a 2x4, hopefully!

Thanks for jumping on that Brownie "joke," it's not only inappropriate AF but the "joke" itself is incredibly ancient and wasn't considered to be all that funny when it was brand new. So disgusting--even if it were a joke about Scouts and Brownies IRL, that would mean a boy of 10-18 performing oral on a girl 7-9 and that's just sick. Haha funny "joke." Sexual abuse of a prepubescent girl is sooooooo high-larious! :barf:

Dropzone drops in to this thread in post 8 and makes no sense then continues to make no sense and by post 22 he's offering to drive to a NJ Dopefest to see Jennshark (married, to a woman) in her too-tight yoga pants that nobody but him is talking about.

I've seen him do similar stuff lately so that's why I reported him.

aceplace57, allegedly married with two daughters and a son, makes another post that screams "single guy."
He's not even trying anymore.

How did you miss that?

He still takes a stab at it now and then. Earlier this week he talked about buying a washer and dryer at Home Depot and remembered to include the wife (probably because he associates wives with laundry).

I almost responded to that, but would have got mod attention for the warning, which would have discovered the sock. So, here's what I was about to post:

Oh, I missed this:

Thank you, BigTard for standing up for Truth, Justice, and The American Way. Your moralizing is not really appreciated. Cunt.

Aside from being banal, utterly worthless and innumerable, his posts are always profoundly depressing to me. It's like reading poetry of despair.

Or the diary of a lobotomized patient. Entry after entry...

Damn, you can just see him getting more and more excited as the thread progresses.

The line breaks alone make me both depressed and murderous.

Oh gross. :barf: I'm guessing the only reason the mods haven't said anything by now is that they feel bad because his wife just died.

I feel bad for the guy, but who on earth thinks that's appropriate?

Acey's posts filled with banalities and platitudes are somehow much worse than his political rants and skeevy sex posts.

I wonder if Bar-Bar is settled in Denver yet? I almost wish he was posting again. Without him, the Dope is ... not un-boring.

Acey waxes Proustian.

91 sux as a thread seed and you did something cool with it.

I have decided this thread shall......live. :thumbs:

I take zero credit for it--the eXCiting part came up in the Snark Title Thread as a candidate for the last one then got amended to eXCIting for this one. I only added the Durp bit to keep it in regulations and had the intestinal fortitude to actually start the thread. :thumbs:

ETA: Oh, and kudos to ITD for bringing the mod slap to that pervy shitheel.

Nice. Nothing better than literary snark.

Well, sex. And drugs. The smell of a cedar forest. Sunset on the ocean. A contented cat purring in your lap on a rainy day. Unexpected windfalls. Steak, or really any number of foods. Don’t be so literal.

By Jove, that might be a candidate for the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest.

Fairly new poster:

How many of you unbutton your pants after a large meal?

I don't find acey's posts depressing, mostly due to some of the vile shit he's posted over the years. I get a kind of smug self-satisfaction in the idea that he leads a completely and utterly meaningless life and will never get within kissing distance of an actual real life woman.

If there is any durper whose posts I do find depressing, it has to be Quasimodal. Reading his Sad Sack posts couched in feigned optimism for so long, I've come to realize that this guy is actually going to one day honest-to-god blow his fucking brains out.

Interestingly, Acey's Terminator fanfiction takes a rather different approach to line breaks:

terentii and DSYoungEsq get into a :durpfight: about whether or not some alien puppet croaked in the ST:TOS episode "Catspaw."

Starts here at post #65.

Hey, I like Star Trek as much as anyone else, but I don't let myself get bogged down in minutiae. It's like William Shatner said on SNL, "Get a life, will ya?"

One thing I've learned about the Dope, besides "don't provoke the atheists," is that you shouldn't try to argue with terentii about TOS. That guy could lecture you all day long about the function of each button on Kirk's chair.

TLDR

WHAT HAVE YOU GOT AGAINST ATHEISTS???? :raeg: DOES YOUR SKY FRIEND TELL YOU TO PROVOKE US??? :raeg:

God bless you and them always!!! :) :) :)

What about that shitty country singer? Not him?

She's all hung up on a new guy. A dead one. Suicide.

Oh, excuuuse me. I failed to specify that there was really no need to read the OP.

Oh yeah? Well, what was the combination of Kirk's safe in "The Tholian Web"? I'll bet you don't know that one, do you?

Ian Curtis? Kurt Cobain? The guy from Soundgarden?