Hi, I'm Chris and I'm a drug addict.
 

Some of you who are friends with me on Facebook already know this, but I don't think I've ever talked about it or said it on here.

So, full reveal. I'm a current drug addict. I'm addicted to Percoset. I don't have a prescription for it and I don't take it for pain (I never have)..I take it purely for the recreational high, which is the reason as to why I first took it. So, basically, the full definition of a drug addict.

I admit it has control over my life. I admit it's a problem. I admit I'm helpless to stop.
I admit all of that.


I'm not ready to quit yet, though. I'm not ready to go to rehab. I have no desire to stop. That may change someday. Or it may kill me before it changes. I realize/recognize that fact. I know the full consequences and risks that I take, every day, by taking this illegal, addicting drug.

I've been addicted to it and taking it now, every day, for three or four years, for the record.

And that's all. Just something you might not have already known about me.

Well that explains a lot.

Oh yeah? Like?

This will not end well.

How much does it cost?

Does addiction ever?

Hi, I'm Chris and I'm a drug addict.
 

Hi, Chris.

I'm Mark, and although I am not addicted I will not turn down oxy when offered, and keep a few in my medicine cabinet for "emergencies".

I usually drink a few beers before taking oxys.

Chris: do you partake every day? Are you able to :threadshit:?

so, this 12 step stuff where you are powerless? works for some people, but not for everyone. I like to say that anytime the subject comes up because it doesn't help me.

meanwhile, I sense just the smallest smidge of hostility here :haw: so let me just say :ohdear: about that

this whole society is messed up about drugs - some are "good" some are "bad" we can't let you have this one but we insist you have that one. blah, blah, blah. :sciencefail: and it gets worse! just wait til you are old. :harumph:


sure - people give up smoking cigarettes all the time, for example

Your lack of self respect. Depression. And desire to troll. Although your troll is weaksauce.

I don't usually feel depressed. I used to, though..regularly, years ago, before the perc. But it seems to act just like any medication for depression does. I haven't had any real deep or regular bouts of depression for awhile.
As my lack of self respect, I've had that all of my life, trust me. That came wayyyy before the drugs. That started in my early teens living with an emotionally abusive father. : p

That stuff might have come before the drug but it seems to be one way you cope with it. You might want to try other, less messy ways instead.

Of course, the logical response to that is, "Oh yeh? Like what?" and I don't have the answer to that. Still...

This is quite a revelation, on par with the bombshell that you are really a woman!

"If I said you had a beautiful body would you ban me at the durp dude?"

I have nothing to add. Seek help dude. Before it is too late. Over and out.

Are you fucking CRAZY?!?? Percocet is chock-full of acetominophen:harumph:!!! You're gonna kill your liver!! Switch to percodan! Or better yet, pure oxycodone!

No specifics please but how generally do you get the drugs?

If you know anyone who knows chemistry, it's a simple matter to remove the acetaminophen, discard it, and consume what's left.

I've heard.

ETA: at least that holds true for Tylenol/codeine combos. Anyone know if it applies to oxy combos?

I'm assuming you get them from someone you know who has a prescription. But don't those people need them for their condition? Or if not, how do they have a prescription? Is it from a crooked doctor?

I also don't wan't specifics on your situation, but I am curious how it all works. It seems like there'd be too much oversight for it to be easy; you often hear about legit pain patients not getting enough medicine because the doctors are afraid of being accused of over-prescribing.

Back when quaaludes were a thing, I knew a really messed up guy in his late teens who had a script for them. He was supposed to take them multiple times a day, and he'd be kind of normal when he did.

Instead, he occasionally would take one but save the rest each day. He then sold/gave away what he didn't take.

I’ve given my extra Norco to people on the rare occasion that I have them but it’s no where near enough to maintain someone’s addiction.

Wait, isn't that called "meth?"

Isn't what called meth?

Things that are not meth:
Acetaminophen
Percocet
Percocet with the acetaminophen removed (wouldn't call this a "simple matter" myself, but my pharmaceutical days were vocational rather than recreational)
Percodan
Oxycodone
Codeine
oxy combos

Things that are meth:
Meth

Opioids and meth are kind of the opposite of each other.

I never take more than 2000 mg of acetominophen a day. FDA says up to 3000-4000 is okay. Over 4000 is overdose range. That's in a 24 hour period.

Now, I may be killing my liver over time, yes...you're right...same if I had been drinking heavily all this time. But I'm not gonna die of an acetominophen overdose immediately. I'm too safe for that.

I have a few suppliers. Close, trusted people.

Cold water extraction. Pretty simple...just time consuming, a bit. I don't usually bother with it.

So why are you choosing to talk about it on here now?

I've never talked to you before, and I realize that sounds much worse than what I mean it to. Please know that it is an honest, serious question, not an attempt to jab at you.

Because I read Tim's thread about his drug past and figured I'd come out about mine. *shrug*

Until you're rrady to kick the pills, you're just bragging about being an addict.

I'm guessing hundreds if not thousands of people everyday seek help. And I'm guessing few of them are actually "stronger" than you are.

But why? What did you hope to accomplish? Why was it important for you to throw your current use out here just because Tim taked about his past?

Again, these are serious questions. You can shrug them off if you choose, no worries.

How do you afford drugs on a disability income?

Oh, I'm more than hostile. I'm fucking livid.

Let me tell you about my mother, who is turning 77 shortly.

She has inoperable spinal stenosis and had a pelvic fracture in 2013, which was also inoperable, and which also healed improperly. She also has severe rheumatoid arthritis, a titanium rod in her left femur after she broke it in a fall a year ago, chronic shoulder pain because her rotator cuff is shot. She is in constant excruciating pain, can barely walk, stand, or sit upright. Her pain is barely mitigated by fentanyl patches and a legitimate prescription for oxycodone; she takes the oxys next to never because she hates how they make her feel.

I have her medical power of attorney; she also has aphasia thanks to a stroke in 2014 and hates to talk to her doctors because she's embarrassed by the way she sounds. Therefore, every month, I get to go through the rigmarole of getting her legitimate script for fentanyl issued, drive 20 miles to her doctor's office to pick up the written script, drive back, run the gauntlet at the pharmacy while praying they have the motherfucking things in stock so that she gets the new patch in time because they won't fill the fucking legitimate prescription one nanosecond before it's due.

Every month, she panics for days because what if they won't issue the prescription or the pharmacy can't fill it and what if she runs out and goes into withdrawl, which makes her lie there on the couch shaking and sweating and itching and crying.

She has legitimate need for that fentanyl, and has so much fucking trouble getting it. Why? Because the restrictions keep getting tightened because of fucking recreational abusers.

So you go ahead and enjoy your little thrill, Idle Thoughts. You keep thinking it ain't no big thang. You rock that fucking shitload of "meh, whatevs." I'll think of you every time Mom shits herself because she can't hobble to the bathroom in time because getting off the couch or out of bed is too painful. I'll think of you every time I have to help her clean up as she's crying and begging me to forgive her for making so much trouble for me.

And the same goes for other recreational users. You're fucking hurting my mother, and I'm ok with being fucking hostile about that.

I'm moved by your post, Rat Diva, and share your hostility. It sounds terrible for both you and your mother.

@ IT, really close, trusted friends wouldn't supply your habit. I know you can't help someone if they don't want to be helped, but it sounds like you need an intervention.

He'd love an intervention because it would mean SO MUCH ATTENTION! That's what he wants and everyone lines up to give it to him. Every so often he'll start up some seemingly self abasing mea culpa thread about how he takes drugs but won't stop or eats disgustingly until he's sick and obese but won't stop or drinks eighty seven bottles of pop in a day but won't stop and people pile in to urge him to OMG SAVE HIMSELF and he just continues on with his stupid "Yes, YES, I am a piece of shit, tell me more!" while priming the pump further with more statements about how he's nevah evah gonna change.

So why not just take him at his word and let him kill himself by whatever slow method he wants? He's heard all the advice, he puts it in the OP that he knows what he does is wrong and stupid and unhealthy, then brags about how he's not going to stop. So, one more time.


STOP
FEEDING
THIS
FUCKING
TROLL.

Or tell me again what a meaniepants I am. I know I'm a meaniepants and I'm not going to stop--does that push the button?

Hey, Chris. I've been in your shoes. You're in the wrong, and this is not the hill to die on.

Come back when you're ready for help. Drama like this leads to fake internet suicides.

Smarty, yes you're a meaniepants, but I'm deleting my lecture on kindness, in this case Chris doesn't deserve the backup. His addiction has repercussion for others, even if he's not stealing meds from cancer patients.

Now, let's all hold hands and sing a few rounds of Kumbayah.

Chris, get help. It's not here, but it's out there.

I'd rather be a bully than an enabler. If anyone is okay with their own complicity in another person's self destruction then that's their karma, but I'm not one of them. I'm also completely okay with making sure everyone involved is up to speed about being used as a source of supply so they can make an informed decision as to whether or not they want to play the game.

Yeah, I decided Chris didn't deserve the back up and deleted my lecture about real humans with real problems. Decided deep deep down, you wouldn't care. Bullying and lying is OK if you do it. Got it. Taking meds from cancer patients is reprehensible, but so is treating a human as garbage because of their disease.

I don't expect anyone to walk a path I haven't already traversed.

Say what?

I think people should be allowed to choose their own path.

Sorry for all the editing, but I wanted to say exactly what I mean. You're kind of a 'know it all' and it comes across sometimes as dismissing other's assessments of their own shit with a 'Smartie knows best' matriarchal vibe that can grate.

Like I don't know that! If I had a nickel...

Why does anyone make any topic on any message board? Because I felt like it. Is that wrong? It was something I wanted to share....like people share other parts of their life in topic updates.


Pick one.


Thanks for the heartfelt reply, Khampelf. I'm sorry about your mother, Rat Diva.

I feel compelled to post because Smartie is saying not to - is there anything more ironic than opening a post from someone you consider a troll and shouting in red letters not to post here?

rather than, you know, putting Mr. Sandwich on ignore and not showing up to try and boss others around. :blahblah:

Ratty, I'm sorry about your Mom too but I seriously doubt it's as simple as you think - that if "bad" people didn't take those drugs the doctors would give them to the "good" people.

The fact that some people abuse opiates should have zero impact on those people with legitimate therapeutic need.

Oopsie daisy, this is a wrong threadination it is.

Sorry about that.

Ok yes?

Whether its wrong or not isn't mine to judge. I was just trying to understand where you were coming from. You, however, have made it abundantly clear with your replies that you don't really care to have that conversation, so I'll leave you to your...whatever this is.

Mr. Idle Thoughts, by the way, I would advise you to seek help.

My SDMB handle is "Ed" should you wish to dance. Sometimes I sock up as Mr. Ed, Mister Ed, The Ed! and Lord Ed as well - I hope you don't mind.

Sir Ed.

By no specifics, I meant no details that would help someone else get illegal meds.

So, "I get them from a dealer", "I get them on the internet", "I use fake prescriptions", "I acquire more than I need and sell the extras at a profit" and such are fine.

An actual web site, how to make a convincing fake 'script, the physical location of a pill mill and such would be too specific.

yes, exactly

Okay, I get them from a few dealers who give them to me for free. Thus, how much I make doesn't come into it.

I really hope you are just trolling us with this.

Really, I do.

I'm not, and I don't really see why it would matter to you so much anyway if I wasn't.

He's all about "personal responsibility" as he begs for someone else to pay for a $500 broken window in his business. And he's not trolling us. Really. He's actually that fucked in the tiny thing he likes to call a 'Brain'.