Get in here and say howdy!

[SmartAleq]

To new member ncoggneato! Who, in addition to being total awesomesauce, is also a very good friend of mine that I've been beating with many, many wet noodles to get her ass in gear and get on board the 'Raffer train. We must make sure she posts a lot because she's smart and funny and, true to her name, NEATO!

*runs around doing total spazzdance*





_{BTW, tard, you need ten posts before I can send you a PM letting you know this thread is here--git on it!}

[wring]

Hi. We're mostly harmless.

[Wolf Larsen]

Welcome ncoggneato!

Any friend of Smartie is someone to keep a careful watch on welcome!

[Panacea]

LET ME PEEM YOU

[Uthrecht]

Heya ncoggneato. Hope you have fun around here. Don't hold SmartAleq against us.

[Panacea]

Can I hold SmartAleq against me?

[SmartAleq]

Originally Posted by NinetyWt

Can I hold SmartAleq against me?

Oh baby, oh baby!


_{Did I tell you I've been brainstorming a low tech, wood fired hot tub? Iz true!}

[hajario]

Welcome to the Boards!

[Dragonlady]

Following Aleqs "requests" - always a good idea.

HOW-DEE!!
Welcome aboard, mind the gap.

[Wolf Larsen]

Originally Posted by NinetyWt

Can I hold SmartAleq against me?

Webcam?

[Panacea]

Originally Posted by SmartAleq

_{Did I tell you I've been brainstorming a low tech, wood fired hot tub? Iz true!}

Gomer can help!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p2ZlqL_kkVc

[Khampelf]

Welcome and Howdy ncoggneato!

Do you prefer 'cog' or 'Neato'? We won't be typing that whole thing out much longer.

D'ya know Howdy is cowboy short hand for how do you do, or How do ye?

[GoSmoke]

Howdy!

[taters]

Welcome!

[ivylass]

Ha! I got in before the streaking!

Welcome!

[Pirate]

Hi. Don't mind the mess.

[severe delays]

Hello.

[Euryphaessa]

Hello and welcome!

[Taur]

Originally Posted by wring

Hi. We're mostly harmless.

Have you *met* Zombies!?


Oh, hellurrrr.

[wring]

Originally Posted by Board Taurus

Have you *met* Zombies!?

hence the "mostly"

[Carolia]

Hello, friend of Smartie! Welcome aboard! Yeah, mostly harmless sums it up pretty well.

[MissJeanLouise]

Howdy, eggnog!

[eleanorigby]

If we're saying howdy to Neato, where is she? Is this an episode of Candid Camera where I end up talking to the air and you all guffaw while hiding behind furniture?

[SmartAleq]

Heh, she's a total nightowl and is probably blissfully snoozing at the moment. I texted her to get her ass up and say hello in retaliation for having texted ME at some ungodly hour to tell me she'd registered and I should come read her first post.

Which is not to say we might not just hide behind furniture and guffaw because, well, we're pretty much all assholes like that...

[ncoggneato]

WOW!!! What a warm welcome! Thank you. I feel so special and not just short bus special but close to your heart special which is my favorite.

I officially lost my message board cherry today (with all of you) and am a long way from Jenna Jamison status so hopefully everyone takes it nice and easy with me. I will need lots of kissing and to hear "you're so hot" and "have you lost weight?" a shit ton for a while before I am comfortable which clearly makes that the problem of all of YOU since I am co opting SmartAleq's friends. You are all my friends now too whether you like it or not. I am like that creepy drunk uncle at the family gatherings that always seems to end up in the same room with you, standing next to you, possibly grazing your ass and always seems to end up drawing your name for the Secret Santa. Can't get rid of me now and I am NEEDY!!

In response to the shortening of my name, as my grandpa used to say, I don't care what you call me as long as you don't call me late to supper".

Yay! I am excited! and scuurrded... and I just discovered the smiley faces and somehow changed my font and can't figure out how to change it back to what it was...

[Chacoguy]

You're so hot! Have you lost weight?:disco:

[Rebo]

I thought we got rid of that smilie?

Oh - and a big Texas HOWDY!!! to ncoggneato!

[ncoggneato]

oh and Smarts? Shut yer face hole about the text this morning. You have been up my butt for MONTHS to get on here and I finally did and I was excited aboot it and thought that my dear close friend (that's you) would be supportive...and bake me a cake to celebrate or whatevs no pressure. White on white. Cake, not people preferences. That still comes off a little racist, doesn't it?

[ncoggneato]

YAY Chacoguy! You are my new favorite! Smarts who?

[Colonel Plink]

Originally Posted by Chacoguy

You're so hot! Have you lost weight?:disco:

Jesus, man. Why don't you lose all that subtlety and just ask if she puts out.

Christ, I'm surrounded by amateurs.

Welcome to the Freak Show, ncoggneato. Keep lots of ammunition and wet-wipes handy.

[ncoggneato]

Have I posted enough yet to win some new privileges? Why is this message board set up like halfway house?

[SmartAleq]

You thought I'd bake you a caek at 0430? Excuse me a moment...


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!


*wipes tear*

There, that's better. I should treat you better though, since you bring me Blizzards and French fries and tales of workplace woe.

BUT I maded you this thread and did not eated it! Hmph!

And I let you borrow my Bear dog to be your boyfriend!

Nope, I don't need to change a thing because I'm PERFECT!

_{Srsly though, I'm so glad to see you here, iz fun!}

[severe delays]

Originally Posted by ncoggneato

Have I posted enough yet to win some new privileges? Why is this message board set up like halfway house?

Keeps the winos out. Well, under control anyway.

[Colonel Plink]

Originally Posted by ncoggneato

Have I posted enough yet to win some new privileges? ...

Yes. You get to go do some shopping for me.

I need two coconuts, three gallons of cheap table wine, four spools of forty-pound test, some hand grenades and pig. A live one, not something someone's already killed.

[SmartAleq]

Originally Posted by ncoggneato

Have I posted enough yet to win some new privileges? Why is this message board set up like halfway house?

Because of Viagra spammers--when you get to 10 posts NinetyWt can PEEM YOU!

[ncoggneato]

I don't know what PEEM means. Sounds like it could be ouchy.
Do I bring my own pillow or will this NinetyWt be providing me with a selection of things to bite? Wait...

[Panacea]

YES LET ME PEEM YOU

[Panacea]

I have this yummy turkey pillow. Will that do?

[SmartAleq]

IT ONLY HURTS THE FIRST TIME!!!

[ncoggneato]

I am having some serious Posting envy! Everyone around me is in the thousands and here I am still in the single digits.

My perceived inadequacies are causing me to crave a jacked up big wheeled pick up truck with a pair of those disgusting tow hitch dangling ball sacks.

[SmartAleq]

Sports car, dear, you know better than that!

[ncoggneato]

Originally Posted by NinetyWt

I have this yummy turkey pillow. Will that do?

Well! You had me at turkey!!

[Uthrecht]

If it'll make you feel better, you can ask Fenris to zero out my post count again.

[SmartAleq]

Or ask Wenz to bump it up to forty bajillion like she did for hers and wring's!

[ncoggneato]

Originally Posted by Colonel Plink

Yes. You get to go do some shopping for me.

I need two coconuts, three gallons of cheap table wine, four spools of forty-pound test, some hand grenades and pig. A live one, not something someone's already killed.

There seems to be a misunderstanding, Colonel. While I am SURE you are just a delightful creature, I was not seeking for the privilege to shop for you. I am ONLY concerned with things that benefit me directly and immediately and NONE of what you requested does anything for me...except maybe the live pig, cuz they are cute and silly and make me giggle.

[Random Precision]

Hi, welcome, bienvenidos, wilkommen, aloha, yahtahay, howdy, pleezedtameetcha. We're always happy to see fresh meat new members and I hope Smartie clued you in on the safe word.

And did I mention;

Dayum! You're HOT!!! Have you lost weight!?

[ncoggneato]

Originally Posted by Uthrecht

If it'll make you feel better, you can ask Fenris to zero out my post count again.

AGAIN?? Zero it out AGAIN? No that doesn't make me feel any better! That is a pity move like when the teacher has to be partners with one of the students due to odd numbers. Like the teacher wants to be partners with the loser left over kid.

OH GOD!! Am I the loser left over kid?

[Random Precision]

Originally Posted by ncoggneato

OH GOD!! Am I the loser left over kid?

Hey! You're one of us now and NONE of us are the loser leftover kid! Or possibly we all are. The jury's still out on that one.

[Colonel Plink]

Originally Posted by ncoggneato

AGAIN?? Zero it out AGAIN? No that doesn't make me feel any better! That is a pity move like when the teacher has to be partners with one of the students due to odd numbers. Like the teacher wants to be partners with the loser left over kid.

OH GOD!! Am I the loser left over kid?

No, you're the selfish teenager who only thinks of herself.

Fine.

I can get my own fishing line. But you're missing out on a Hell of a barbecue.

[SmartAleq]

Meh, that's Uthy, who apparently has no life and/or types like a maniac. Or has a time machine. We're not sure how he does it but it's a little frightening...