The future is so bright, I gotta wear shades

[-FX-]

Teaching Math In 1950
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit?

Teaching Math In 1960
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or $80. What is his profit?

Teaching Math In 1970
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $80. Did he make a profit?

Teaching Math In 1980
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $80 and his profit is $20. Your assignment: Underline the number 20.

Teaching Math In 1990
By cutting down beautiful forest trees, the logger makes $20. What do you think of this way of making a living? Topic for class participation after answering the question: How did the forest birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut down the trees? (There are no wrong answers.)

Teaching Math In 2000
Loggers cut down trees to make a living, contributing to global warming. How much does it cost the world each time a tree dies? Discuss ways to end logging.

Teaching Math In 2010
Global warming has led to pine beetles killing millions of acres of trees. Loggers also have killed billions of trees. This is one reason the weather is so bad now. How much will it cost to undo the damage global warming has done to the world? Discuss how much taxes should be raised, and what alternatives can be used so we don't have to ever kill a tree again.

[Pencil]

You're really good at this c/p thingie. Let's see if I can play too:

From issue #91 of Recreational & Educational Computing

Teaching Math in 1996

By laying off 40% of its loggers, a company improves its stock price from $80 to $100. How much capital gain per share does the CEO make by exercising his options at $80? Assume capital gains are no longer taxed, because this encourages investment.

Teaching Math in 1997
A company "outsources" all of its loggers. The firm saves on benefits, and when demand for its products is down, the logging work force can easily be cut back. The average logger employed by the company earned $50,000, had three weeks vacation, a nice retirement plan and medical insurance. The contracted logger charges $30 per hour. Was outsourcing a good move?

Teaching Math in 1998
A laid-off logger with four kids at home and a ridiculous alimony from his first failed marriage comes into the logging company corporate offices and goes postal, mowing down 16 executives and a couple of secretaries, and gets lucky when he nails a politician on the premises collecting his kickback. Was outsourcing the loggers a good move for the company?

Teaching Math in 1999
A laid-off logger serving time in Folsom Prison for blowing away several people is being trained as a COBOL Programmer in order to work on Y2K projects. What is the probability that the automatic cell doors will open on their own as of 00:01, 01/01/00?

[Jaglavak]

World population in 1950: 2.5 billion.

World population in 2010: 6.8 billion.

Duh.

[Jaledin]

Can you rape yourself?

190,000 PUAs say yes.

Should you?

You betcha.

[-FX-]

Teaching Math in 1996:
By laying off 402 of its loggers, a company improves its stock price from $80 to $100. How much capital gain per share does the CEO make by exercising his stock options at $80. Assume capital gains are no longer taxed, because this encourages investment.

Teaching Math in 1997:
A company outsources all of its loggers. They save on benefits and when demand for their product is down the logging work force can easily be cut back. The average logger employed by the company earned $50,000, had 3 weeks vacation, received a nice retirement plan and medical insurance. The contracted logger charges $50 an hour. Was outsourcing a good move?

Teaching Math in 1998:
A logging company exports its wood-finishing jobs to its Indonesian subsidiary and lays off the corresponding half of its US workers (the higher-paid half). It clear-cuts 95% of the forest, leaving the rest for the spotted owl, and lays off all its remaining US workers. It tells the workers that the spotted owl is responsible for the absence of fellable trees and lobbies Congress for exemption from the Endangered Species Act. Congress instead exempts the company from all federal regulation. What is the return on investment of the lobbying costs?

http://medicine.yale.edu/labs/henega...okes/math.html

[Jaledin]

K P'ERI UM L P'ERIOUM
N M' pernounnurn
bpretiberrerrebee onooooooooh gplanpouk
kommpout perikoul
rreeeeeEEErreeeee A
oapderree ringlepadonou nntnou
tnournt

Obviously, very famous, but I'm new to copy and pasting. At least my citation has objective merit.

[vramin]

Real life true facts:

I have a family member that is ten. He has, "ADHD" and is therefore stupid. So says the school anyways.

Maths: What is 12+17=?

FM: I dunno thats too hard.

Maths: Fine here is a calculator.

FM: Calculator is too hard.

Maths: Fine the answer is 29. Write that down.

FM: Writing is too hard.

Maths: Ok, I'll write it for you. We need you to get good marks so we don't lose any funding and I don't get fired for not being able to teach.

[Solfy]

A logging company gradually replaces its permanent workforce with 75% untrained "contract" loggers. Each contract logger stays with the company an average of 11 weeks before quitting. It takes 1.8 weeks and 32 man hours to interview/select/do the HR paperwork for each new contractor. Each time a contractor quits, three people have to do 3hrs each of paperwork. In an average year the contract loggers cost the company $125,000 when they accidentally destroy very expensive trees and ruin chainsaws. Write an essay to explain how the money saved in reduced salary and lack of benefits from the contractors makes up for the added costs in turnover and reduced competency.

[BJMoose]

My essay:

I cannot explain it. No one can explain it. There was once a sidebar in Fortune suggesting that this would be a great way to make money, and all the little CEOs have been doing it ever since.

[-FX-]

Some people think making money is a good thing. Everyone else is a fucking commie.

[Jaledin]

Originally Posted by vramin

Real life true facts:

I have a family member that is ten. He has, "ADHD" and is therefore stupid. So says the school anyways.

Maths: What is 12+17=?

FM: I dunno thats too hard.

Maths: Fine here is a calculator.

FM: Calculator is too hard.

Maths: Fine the answer is 29. Write that down.

FM: Writing is too hard.

Maths: Ok, I'll write it for you. We need you to get good marks so we don't lose any funding and I don't get fired for not being able to teach.

Your shtikele is running thin. What the fuck are you talking about?

Stupid. Stupid box. Stupid box in a hole. Stupid vagina box hole sand. FUCK YOU.

[-FX-]

Now you got it

[-FX-]

Teaching Math In 2015

Global warming has led to pine beetles killing millions of acres of trees, raging wildfires and landslides and death. Loggers also have killed trillions of trees worldwide. This is why the weather is so bad now. How much will it cost to undo the damage global warming has done to the world? Discuss how much taxes should be raised, and what can be done to destroy the economy by banning logging.

For extra credit describe how bad the weather was today, and why you hate logging.