Which of these burgers would you rather have just based on how it looks?

[Idle Thoughts]

Make a choice based on LOOKS alone. You're not allowed to know all that is on or in the burger, you have to base your decision just on what you think looks the most delicious and that you THINK you'd love the most.

I'm going to make this multiple choice, so in your reply, tell me what burger you'd rather have THE MOST if you could only choose one. You may vote, however, for all of the burgers that you'd destroy based on looks alone.



Burger 1




Burger 2




Burger 3




Burger 4




Burger 5




Burger 6




Burger 7




Burger 8




Burger 9




Burger 10




After a day or three, I MAY reveal what is on/in each burger. If you're nice.

[Pencil]

#1 b/c the egg. Egg burgers are awesome.

[stormie]

I thought # 1 looked suspicious. Like it had an egg on it

[Cochrane]

Burger #9. It kinda looks like a Big Mac without the middle bun, and I love Big Macs.

[The Futility of Nihilism]

I am not a fan of the towering megaburger. I want a normal flat quarter-pound burger on a normal sized bun with just a few items added. #4 comes closest to that ideal, only that's not a burger. Pork chop, maybe? Hard to tell with that glaze.

[joyfool]

I'm going with #7 because it doesn't look as greasy as most of the rest of these. And I concur that 2' tall burgers suck. I don't want to have to unhinge my jaw to eat, use a fork on a burger or wear a bib. Sheesh.

[renter]

My choice would be between 2 and 5 because of the look of the bun. For me when it comes to any sandwich it's all about how the bread looks not so much the meat.

[Wolf Larsen]

Originally Posted by renter

My choice would be between 2 and 5 because of the look of the bun. For me when it comes to any sandwich it's all about how the bread looks not so much the meat.

Especially if the bun is served on a separate plate.

[renter]

Originally Posted by Wolf Larsen

Especially if the bun is served on a separate plate.

I like dark color buns when I eat burgers

[TheChileanBlob]

I didn't even look at them all but I'll eat them anyway.

[Zeener Diode]

Originally Posted by The Futility of Nihilism

I am not a fan of the towering megaburger. I want a normal flat quarter-pound burger on a normal sized bun with just a few items added. #4 comes closest to that ideal, only that's not a burger. Pork chop, maybe? Hard to tell with that glaze.

I bet you go to $tarbuck$ and ask for a cuppa joe.

[Jaglavak]

My body is a temple and I would never sully the purity of my essence.

[Zeener Diode]

Shouldn't you be dispatching bombers over Russia?

[The Futility of Nihilism]

Originally Posted by Zeener Diode

I bet you go to $tarbuck$ and ask for a cuppa joe.

No but I don't order a half whip half soy three-and-a-half shot double-pump mega frappa poopachino, either.

Here's how you make a perfect burger: Start with a regular quarter pound patty. Make it US Prime if you want but seriously that's not important. Cook that burger outside on your properly prepared grill (i.e., real wood charcoal that has long since burned off any starter and is, well, coals). Meanwhile prepare your buns the way you like 'em. Me, I like slightly toasted whole-wheat buns. Easily enough accomplished by putting the buns on the grill a few seconds before you're done.

Then put whatever you want on the burger. I'm down with the traditional mustard-onion-pickle and a big slice of cheddar. Or maybe mayo-lettuce-tomato topped with blue cheese and bacon. No ketchup, though. Ketchup is for fries. Putting ketchup on a burger is Satan's work.

And that's how you make the best burger on the planet.

[Zeener Diode]

You know what the kids are putting on burgers today? Peanut butter.

I blame the breakdown of traditional family values.

[renter]

Originally Posted by Zeener Diode

You know what the kids are putting on burgers today? Peanut butter.

I blame the breakdown of traditional family values.

Anyone putting peanut butter on a burger belongs in a nut house

[Jaglavak]

Originally Posted by Zeener Diode

I blame the breakdown of traditional family values.

I blame the shortage of military reform schools.

[Lungfish]

I wanna eat them all smothered in ketchup. nom nom nom

[Cochrane]

Originally Posted by Jaglavak

My body is a temple and I would never sully the purity of my essence.

By contrast, my body is a funhouse.

[Pencil]

Originally Posted by Jaglavak

My body is a temple and I would never sully the purity of my essence.

Is that an outdoor Pentecostal temple?
Or one of those basement temples where they do freaky thing with chicken entrails?

[silenus]

#1 is right out, because only deviants and Martians eat eggs on burgers. Most of the rest are stunt burgers designed to show off the lack of skill of the cook, not to be actually eaten. #8, 9, & 10 look almost edible.

[Kat]

Before I vote: Would I have to eat the knife in burgers 2 or 7/the stick in burger 10, or are those just garnishes?

[Jaglavak]

Aussies stack it up with a fried egg, crispy bacon, a slice of pineapple, lettuce, fried tomato, a thick slice of beet, cheese, a half pound burger, and mayo. I got some static when I wanted one without the beets, too.

Originally Posted by Pencil

Is that an outdoor Pentecostal temple?

It's a nice private gazebo next to a secret garden.

[Kat]

Originally Posted by Kat

Before I vote: Would I have to eat the knife in burgers 2 or 7/the stick in burger 10, or are those just garnishes?

*pokes @Idle Thoughts with a stick*

[running coach]

Originally Posted by Kat

Before I vote: Would I have to eat the knife in burgers 2 or 7/the stick in burger 10, or are those just garnishes?

Number 2 is because you have to stab it to death.
And I would never eat a burger named "Number 2".

[The Futility of Nihilism]

Originally Posted by Zeener Diode

You know what the kids are putting on burgers today? Peanut butter.

I consider this perfectly acceptable as long as the kids in question have extreme peanut allergies.

[missred]

Most of the burgers have too much crap kn them. I went for #10.

[Wolf Larsen]

McDonald's bacon double cheeseburger is only 2.19 and is quite a nice burger for that price.

[Idle Thoughts]

Originally Posted by Kat

*pokes @Idle Thoughts with a stick*

No.

[Random Precision]

I chose #10 as well. It breaks my first rule that a hamburger shouldn't need to have external structural support to keep from falling over, but it has a lot of bacon on it and that makes up for myriad sins.

[Kat]

I voted for multiple, but I think my top choice may be #10.

Some comments: I unfortunately eliminated 1, despite the presence of the egg, because I don't really like that type of onion bun. I had to skip 4 as well, although the toppings appeal to me, because it looks like someone substituted a McRib patty for the burger. And 9 got cut because I don't like the Big Mac special sauce and it appears to be smothered in a close facsimile of it.

[Joey P]

Originally Posted by Random Precision

I chose #10 as well. It breaks my first rule that a hamburger shouldn't need to have external structural support to keep from falling over, but it has a lot of bacon on it and that makes up for myriad sins.

That's what I was thinking. I don't know how people get their mouths around some of these 'gourmet' burgers* that are 3 or 4 or 5 inches tall (with a 1/4 pound of beef and cost $12). Gimme a Kopps burger (they call them 'manhole burgers for a reason) any day. I've perfected the ability to eat it, while driving stick, and having butter drip in my lap.

*I'm not a bloody mary drinker either, but same goes for that, I don't know how people drink bloodies with all that crap sticking out of the top. I've even seen them with entire roasted chickens or bags of fries on there. But this may be a Milwaukee thing, like fish fries (that's fried fish, not french fries made out of fish and yes, I know, it's not just Milwaukee, but it is very localized around the country, people that are on vacation or visiting here often haven't heard of it, IME).

[Guinastasia]

Burger 10 -- bacon is good, cheeseburgers are good. Together? Even better.

[Random Precision]

I think #4 may be some type of fish - salmon or tuna perhaps. Which is not necessarily a bad thing, but it's not a burger either. It's a fish sandwich.

[Idle Thoughts]

Originally Posted by Random Precision

I think #4 may be some type of fish - salmon or tuna perhaps. Which is not necessarily a bad thing, but it's not a burger either. It's a fish sandwich.

It's a chicken breast "burger".

[Random Precision]

Originally Posted by Idle Thoughts

It's a chicken breast "burger".

Okay. Chicken sandwich.

[Kat]

It doesn't look like chicken.

[Idle Thoughts]

Originally Posted by Kat

It doesn't look like chicken.

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/315111305155407898/

Sieht gut aus. Hoffentlich sieht er auf meinem Teller genauso gut aus!

[Idle Thoughts]

Originally Posted by Random Precision

Okay. Chicken sandwich.

I can't disagree, but it comes up when doing a search of "burger".

[Innocuous Whimsical Bon-Vivant]

Point the first, in my opinion, anything that requires a skewer with which to hold itself together with in this everchanging world in which we're living, is not a sandwich what that deserves consideration in my opinion.

Point the second, the sauce makes the burger, which is why the Big Mac continually trounces all the so-called innovators. People just want thousand-island dressing on their cheeseburgers. It's like the changing of the tides or March Madness in basketball, just let it be.

In conclusion, you are all wrong and I pity you.

[JohnClay]

Here is the KFC Zinger Black - I'm not sure what to think about it....

The bun is black all he way through....

[Innocuous Whimsical Bon-Vivant]

Originally Posted by Idle Thoughts

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/315111305155407898/

Sieht gut aus. Hoffentlich sieht er auf meinem Teller genauso gut aus!

Hau ab, du fastfliessendDeutchspracher.

[Cochrane]

Originally Posted by Innocuous Whimsical Bon-Vivant

Point the first, in my opinion, anything that requires a skewer with which to hold itself together with in this everchanging world in which we're living, is not a sandwich what that deserves consideration in my opinion.

Point the second, the sauce makes the burger, which is why the Big Mac continually trounces all the so-called innovators. People just want thousand-island dressing on their cheeseburgers. It's like the changing of the tides or March Madness in basketball, just let it be.

In conclusion, you are all wrong and I pity you.

Even me?

Originally Posted by Cochrane

Burger #9. It kinda looks like a Big Mac without the middle bun, and I love Big Macs.

[JohnClay]

Pink buns too:
http://abc7ny.com/food/kfc-rolling-o...-china/924082/

[Jaglavak]

Originally Posted by Innocuous Whimsical Bon-Vivant

In conclusion, you are all wrong and I pity you.

Hey, Runcie. How's it going?

[Borborygmi]

They all look good enough to eat, but I'd rate #4, #5, and #7 as the least attractive so I'll vote the other seven.

If I had to pick one — which I do according to the OP — I'd go with #3.

Much of the side conversation has been about burgers that are too big/tall. I generally agree that that ideally you want a patty-shaped burger patty and a modest amount of toppings. But, when it comes to burgers I apparently have the capacity to hold contrary beliefs at the same time and will also get drooly when presented with burger pr0n like pictures #3 and #9.

[Inner Stickler]

2 looks the tastiest to me.

[kayaker]

Originally Posted by Pencil

#1 b/c the egg. Egg burgers are awesome.

Yep.

[Solfy]

Originally Posted by faithfool

I'm going with #7 because it doesn't look as greasy as most of the rest of these. And I concur that 2' tall burgers suck. I don't want to have to unhinge my jaw to eat, use a fork on a burger or wear a bib. Sheesh.

This. I am also a big fan of mushrooms on burgers.
I easily narrowed it down to 2 or 7, and I almost voted for 2 based on the excellent looking bun, but 7 won because 2 was too thick/tall.

[Jaglavak]

Originally Posted by Solfy

I easily narrowed it down to 2 or 7, and I almost voted for 2 based on excellent looking buns, but 7 won because 2 was too thick/tall.

Thank you for playing the dating game! Can we get a big round of applause for Solfy and 7, I'm sure they'll be happy together! And now, a word from our sponsor.