135: I'd Like to Teach the Durp to Snark (In Perfect Harmony)

[Someone]

Dim_B has changed his avatar. And he started a thread to let us all know



The reason:

I certainly don’t consider myself a villain in any way. But I used it in a couple of other message boards. I think it is thought-provoking in any event.

EDIT: Actually I don’t like the way the picture is centered. Oh, well. I guess it is good enough. Can the rest of you tell what it is? That is the important thing.

[Someone]

SiamSam shows his classy self in yet another strange names* thread:

He or they have been bandied about an awfully long time. I’m starting to wonder if they’re real. That said, if my name were Harold Beaver, I would definitely go by Harry if I became an ObGyn.

*Those are really like catnip for Derpers.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

SiamSam shows his classy self in yet another strange names* thread:

*Those are really like catnip for Derpers.

I suppose it beats his former "SDMB's Cherished, Revered, Grand Old Ex-Pat Pedophile" persona who for years breathlessly told his rapt Doper audience ribald, exotic tales of "Blowjob Bars" and "Ping-Pong Ball Shows" and how much he delighted in paying desperate, exploited 15 and 16 year-old children from 3rd World countries $11.35 for bouts of degrading, coercive sex.

Smartest, Hippest!!!

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

When I read the linked post about masks by HnS I thought that she's got a point. Sorta. Kinda.

Then late yesterday I read about seat belts but I was too tired to write something, and whadyaknow, thanks to the magic of time zones, people have responded while I slept. I think it's an interesting discussion for another thread.

I'll throw in a similar argument I heard a long time ago ('85) when I was an exchange student in Chicago, where I don't think there were a seat belt law at the time*: I'd rather bounce around, rather then being strapped in and not be able to get out.


*Perhaps Indiana, since the dude was from Gary.

You could make that argument -- for example, because its what your gut says feels right. Or, like those of us woth more than two brain cells to rub together, you could look at the scientific evidence and the thousands of tests they've run as well as the thousands of real world incidents that have been studied. And if you look at the evidence,it becomes clear that this argument is full of shit.

Eta: I'm not saying YOU are missing those brain cells, I'm saying people who make the argument you heard are

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

When I read the linked post about masks by HnS I thought that she's got a point. Sorta. Kinda.

Then late yesterday I read about seat belts but I was too tired to write something, and whadyaknow, thanks to the magic of time zones, people have responded while I slept. I think it's an interesting discussion for another thread.

I'll throw in a similar argument I heard a long time ago ('85) when I was an exchange student in Chicago, where I don't think there were a seat belt law at the time*: I'd rather bounce around, rather then being strapped in and not be able to get out.


*Perhaps Indiana, since the dude was from Gary.

I am actually not advocating that everybody not wear seat belts, you know. I am saying throw the focus more on preventing accidents in the first place, because most accidents are preventable if you're paying attention. I have a problem with seat belts--they don't fit me and I'm continually having to adjust so it doesn't strangle me. This is a distraction and if I'm alone in my car it's a distraction I can do without. If there's anybody else in my car we are all belted up including me. (Excluding the dog and I would belt him in if I could.) But I have only had one car where the seat belt did not rise up and try to strangle me and that car is long gone. So if I'm wearing it I'm either continually plucking it away from me and moving it down. It annoys me every single minute. As a passenger I can hold it down but as a driver I feel I need both my hands.

Originally Posted by Someone

I'm cool with you not wearing a seat belt when you drive so long as you're cool with society not wasting any resources on saving you when you get in an accident and get injured because of it. Sounds good?

Fine with me actually. Society hasn't wasted a lot of resources on me to date, why start when I'm brain dead?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I am saying throw the focus more on preventing accidents in the first place, because most accidents are preventable if you're paying attention.

Staying alert and watching out for others ("head on a swivel, et al") is the number one priority for any driver. But there's always the one that you miss, or that comes at you before you can react; that's why they're called "accidents."

I have a problem with seat belts--they don't fit me and I'm continually having to adjust so it doesn't strangle me. This is a distraction and if I'm alone in my car it's a distraction I can do without. If there's anybody else in my car we are all belted up including me. (Excluding the dog and I would belt him in if I could.) But I have only had one car where the seat belt did not rise up and try to strangle me and that car is long gone. So if I'm wearing it I'm either continually plucking it away from me and moving it down. It annoys me every single minute. As a passenger I can hold it down but as a driver I feel I need both my hands.

There are sleeves you can attach to shoulder strap belts that will add comfort. Some drivers even go so far as to use a clothes pin on the strap to allow more room, but this defeats the purpose of having an impact-reacting lock that prevents you from flying into the windshield or face-planting into the airbag as it explodes in front of you. You're an adult, I can't tell you how to live your life, but your explanation doesn't exempt you from being mocked for your opinions.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I have a problem with seat belts--they don't fit me and I'm continually having to adjust so it doesn't strangle me. This is a distraction and if I'm alone in my car it's a distraction I can do without. If there's anybody else in my car we are all belted up including me. (Excluding the dog and I would belt him in if I could.) But I have only had one car where the seat belt did not rise up and try to strangle me and that car is long gone. So if I'm wearing it I'm either continually plucking it away from me and moving it down. It annoys me every single minute. As a passenger I can hold it down but as a driver I feel I need both my hands.

Have you tried a seat belt positioner/adjuster? Here's one on Amazon(there's a ton of others, this is just an example).

[Someone]

The next time some MAGA hat wearing troglodyte decides to massage his man beans while driving beside you on the highway and loses control of his car, I bet you'll be pretty happy you're securely belted in.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Staying alert and watching out for others ("head on a swivel, et al") is the number one priority for any driver. But there's always the one that you miss, or that comes at you before you can react; that's why they're called "accidents."

Yeah, in my 20s I worked with a bunch of people who had a lot of "accidents" and they always said, "I just didn't see that other car."

So my advice to my kids when they starting driving was, (a) look twice and make sure and (b) be visible (daytime running lights and no sneaky colors). So far so good with the kids' driving records.

...You're an adult, I can't tell you how to live your life, but your explanation doesn't exempt you from being mocked for your opinions.

And being mocked doesn't change my opinion.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

And being mocked doesn't change my opinion.

Of course not. I hope karma doesn't intervene to teach you a lesson you shouldn't need to be taught.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Dim_B has changed his avatar. And he started a thread to let us all know



The reason:

I can’t find the thread now, but didn’t he start a thread in ATMB about whether it would be confusing if he changed his user name, and the collective answer was “who are you, again?”

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

“who are you, again?”

<----- Dim_B

[Someone]

We've got another Covidiot in agzem.

Originally Posted by Someone

Cases are irrelevant. Most are never hospitalized. Cuomo and DeBlasio's complete incompetence is what spread this to other states. Florida did a great job **flattening the curve** which was the whole objective and they are far below average in deaths.

https://news.yahoo.com/cuomo-rejects...183909198.html

https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to...ion/917910/99?

And multiple posts following.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

(Excluding the dog and I would belt him in if I could.)

Plenty of other people have jumped on the rest of this, so I'll jump on this part. Of course you can belt the dog in. Go put "dog seat belt harnesses" into a search engine.


(Most cars now have a vertical slider adjustment for the height of the seat belt that removes the strangling problem without the need for after-market gizmos. I don't know whether there are some models without, or how old your car is; and I have run into at least one that won't come down far enough for me; but for anyone having this problem, it's the first thing to check.)

[Someone]

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Plenty of other people have jumped on the rest of this, so I'll jump on this part. Of course you can belt the dog in. Go put "dog seat belt harnesses" into a search engine.


(Most cars now have a vertical slider adjustment for the height of the seat belt that removes the strangling problem without the need for after-market gizmos. I don't know whether there are some models without, or how old your car is; and I have run into at least one that won't come down far enough for me; but for anyone having this problem, it's the first thing to check.)

It does slide and that doesn't help.

We did have a dog seat belt thingy that went through a harness. He did not like wearing a harness, but he put up for it for his flyball lessons, when he had to. Other than that he didn't mind except he couldn't attack the windshield wipers. Feature not bug.

[Someone]

Nazi sympathizer Max SS is Just Asking Questions about German "war crimes" during WWII (as if we could really call them "crimes," am I right? LOL).

Originally Posted by Someone

I’ve always thought the Nuremberg trials make for an interesting part of history, particularly the charges of “crimes against humanity”. I am much underread on this topic, but my impression is that Nazi crimes against humanity were, for the most part, legal at the time and in the jurisdiction where they were committed.

Did the Nazis break the law? Did the Nazis follow illegal orders?

[Someone]

Re: strangling seat belts. I use a hair tie on the part that goes into the buckle. See?

I apologize if the pic is huge. I'm on my phone. Please ignore my belly! *

[Someone]

Hm, yeah. What belly?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Nazi sympathizer Max SS is Just Asking Questions about German "war crimes" during WWII (as if we could really call them "crimes," am I right? LOL).

Did the Nazis break the law? Did the Nazis follow illegal orders?

Not just the OP, the rest of the thread has this icky feel of people trying to downplay Nazi atrocities because they don't like that various modern political figures have been compared to Nazis. Like, if you feel personally attacked because someone brought up Nazis in a political context, maybe try some other strategy than "well, were Nazis really that bad?". Literally any other strategy.

[Someone]

Couldn’t of/couldn’t have


k9befriender wins the thread:

Irregardlessly, I coulda cared less about whom makes your head literally esplode.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Not just the OP, the rest of the thread has this icky feel of people trying to downplay Nazi atrocities because they don't like that various modern political figures have been compared to Nazis. Like, if you feel personally attacked because someone brought up Nazis in a political context, maybe try some other strategy than "well, were Nazis really that bad?". Literally any other strategy.

"Yabbut it was LEGAL genocide!" doesn't really bring me around to their side.

Of course there are idiots out there who gush about how handsome Mengele was, as if that somehow makes up for the heinous things he did...

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Of course there are idiots out there who gush about how handsome Mengele was, as if that somehow makes up for the heinous things he did...

Back in the mid 2000s I saw women in a chatroom say "well, I don't like Putin's actions at all but he does look hot with his shirt off". My tastes don't swing that way so I can't compare him to most American presidents, but I have to admit he does look better than Donnie boy.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Back in the mid 2000s I saw women in a chatroom say "well, I don't like Putin's actions at all but he does look hot with his shirt off". My tastes don't swing that way so I can't compare him to most American presidents, but I have to admit he does look better than Donnie boy.

Jabba The Hutt looks better than Donnie boy.

[Someone]

Acey is happy to report plans about building a drive-in theatre in Little Rock.

I definitely want to go see a drive-in movie with my family. We’ll bring our own Soda, popcorn and candy.

There's a joke to be made about his driving abilities and vision, but it's too damned hot for me to come up with anything witty. Also - what family? You'd think his 'daughters' are too old to go to the drive-in with daddy.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Acey is happy to report plans about building a drive-in theatre in Little Rock.

There's a joke to be made about his driving abilities and vision, but it's too damned hot for me to come up with anything witty. Also - what family? You'd think his 'daughters' are too old to go to the drive-in with daddy.

It is Arkansas.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Back in the mid 2000s I saw women in a chatroom say "well, I don't like Putin's actions at all but he does look hot with his shirt off". My tastes don't swing that way so I can't compare him to most American presidents, but I have to admit he does look better than Donnie boy.

I think that's why trump fell for Putin too. Someone needs to photoshop that picture on one of the pictures behind trumps desk in the oval office.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Jabba The Hutt looks better than Donnie boy.

The uncanny valley in action, perhaps. Trump looks almost human, which puts him deep in the valley, but Jabba is clear over on the other side.

[Someone]

Melbourne resurrects a four month old thread just to get in a "Shut up, BigT!

Originally Posted by Someone

Mostly, I don't bother to respond to mistakes like that, but I think it's worth mentioning, just so that you know, that you are incorrect.

I don't know about that one. But, since Australia was mentioned as the context for that word, I'll report that *in Australia*, the word is mostly applied to men, and never compares them to women, directly or indirectly. It compares them to other cunts -- that is, it compares them to men. It is a gendered word. If it is applied to a woman, it is categorizing her as someone who can be dealt with as a man.

https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fu...man/852395/84?

[Someone]

Boring.

Much more fun to focus on Slackwit lack wit, who has his latest illustration of what a dim, easily manipulated, bulb he is (Carlson the vile thread), and the fact he's a superficial, modestly dim middle-brow twit.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Acey is happy to report plans about building a drive-in theatre in Little Rock.

There's a joke to be made about his driving abilities and vision, but it's too damned hot for me to come up with anything witty. Also - what family? You'd think his 'daughters' are too old to go to the drive-in with daddy.

Their ages are variables that depend on the needs of the moment. Very convenient when you can just turn a dial and not have to change diapers or put up with the 'terrible twos'.

[Someone]

Speaking of children of beloved Dopers, sadly, etv78 has been having trouble with little Eric Jr., who has fallen in with a bad crowd at band camp and has taken up smoking black Algerian hashish and was also caught stealing several pairs of "The View" co-host Joy Behar's soiled panties.

[Someone]

Aaaand, I've placed Max SS on ignore, because I've decided there is no point carrying on discussion with someone who thinks laws exist as a fig-leaf to justify state action and capriciousness. Which, by the way, is not the same as "the rule of law." Quite the contrary.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Their ages are variables that depend on the needs of the moment. Very convenient when you can just turn a dial and not have to change diapers or put up with the 'terrible twos'.

And when Acey can't be bothered to figure out their relative ages, he makes them the same age. Not twins—just sisters who happen to be the same age.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

And when Acey can't be bothered to figure out their relative ages, he makes them the same age. Not twins—just sisters who happen to be the same age.

Maybe his wife had a double uterus and the pregnancies overlapped.

[Someone]

I just wish WhiteSquare99 would STFU already about avatars and discobot. It’s not a question of whether the cause is righteous or not, but rather how asinine it is.

Same thread as before, and mostly kept going because The Square keeps reminding those of us who occasionally find ways to amuse ourselves with discobot that it exists (the thread and the bot).

https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ba...215?u=asl_v2.0

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Maybe his wife had a double uterus and the pregnancies overlapped.

hey, that works. i'm sure he'll glom onto that explanation the next time someone points out the flaws in his 'family' stories!

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I just wish WhiteSquare99 would STFU already about avatars and discobot. It’s not a question of whether the cause is righteous or not, but rather how asinine it is.

Same thread as before, and mostly kept going because The Square keeps reminding those of us who occasionally find ways to amuse ourselves with discobot that it exists (the thread and the bot).

https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ba...215?u=asl_v2.0

There is someone who's using a transparent square as their avatar, can't remember who because I just saw it while scrolling through a thread. However, it proves that the invisible avatar trick is possible. Others have pointed out that one can block all images with Firefox or use a text-only browser.

OTOH I think WhiteSquare's white square sticks out like a sore thumb, although I'm sure that's the point because otherwise how would everyone know what a pouty snowflake he is?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

OTOH I think WhiteSquare's white square sticks out like a sore thumb, although I'm sure that's the point because otherwise how would everyone know what a pouty snowflake he is?

Honestly, it'd be a pretty good avatar if he didn't always rail against avatars. Like one of them avant-garde monochrome paintings. That it might have a number of interpretations, even as it's just a plain old white square, might actually make it more artistic. If, that is, it weren't meant to be "invisible."

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Honestly, it'd be a pretty good avatar if he didn't always rail against avatars. Like one of them avant-garde monochrome paintings. That it might have a number of interpretations, even as it's just a plain old white square, might actually make it more artistic. If, that is, it weren't meant to be "invisible."

It obviously represents a single precious snowflake lost in a snowbank.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

There is someone who's using a transparent square as their avatar, can't remember who because I just saw it while scrolling through a thread. However, it proves that the invisible avatar trick is possible. Others have pointed out that one can block all images with Firefox or use a text-only browser.

That's me. I was just fooling around in GIMP.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

It obviously represents a single precious snowflake lost in a snowbank.

How do you know it’s not a counter-protest to BLM, specifically the trend of adopting solid black profile pictures and avatars?

Eh?

Eh?

See, multiple possible interpretations, if only The Square hadn’t tipped its hand.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Dim_B has changed his avatar. And he started a thread to let us all know

Sorry to be beating this

But if you click the thread, you can follow the ongoing series: How I changed my Avatar, with its ATMB spin-off Having Psychodelic Mushrooms in an Avatar?


The amount of clueless on display is... riveting.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Sorry to be beating this

But if you click the thread, you can follow the ongoing series: How I changed my Avatar, with its ATMB spin-off Having Psychodelic Mushrooms in an Avatar?


The amount of clueless on display is... riveting.

I'm just as perplexed at Dim's need to ask for permission to use a mushroom as an avatar as I am at E_C_G's suggestion that it's a bad idea. I really like ecg, but that's a dumb response.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I'm just as perplexed at Dim's need to ask for permission to use a mushroom as an avatar as I am at E_C_G's suggestion that it's a bad idea. I really like ecg, but that's a dumb response.

Despite the change of venue, they're still owned by a Paranoid Publication and "endorsement" of illegal drugs is disallowed.

[Someone]

I think CarnalK/J got banned again for socking at the Dope. I'm pretty sure he was Pheonix1, based on his nitpicky responses in COVID threads.

And, I hope it's OK to say this here, but Hilarity N. Suze? You've been the most surprising poster to me in a long while. I knew your handle from various threads, but you've never pinged my radar in a negative sense. However, your ridiculous anti-masker bullshit and your apparent racism around that crazy Central Park dog lady really put you on the map in terms of terrible people. No offense.

[Someone]

If it was Carnal, Phoenix1 was way too obvious a name for a sock.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Psychodelic Mushrooms

The perfect typo.

[Someone]

Duplicate!!

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

If it was Carnal, Phoenix1 was way too obvious a name for a sock.

Well, you actually misspelled it -- it was Pheonix1. See? Nothing to do with rising from the ashes.