When this thing hits 88 durps per hour, you're going to see some serious snark!

[Someone]

Dr.Dumbth Internet Tough Guy Espesheal.

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...9&postcount=16

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

What's your excuse, moron?

You're calling haj dumb? That's a knee slapper.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

CockRing just bitched me out for the same 'failure to notice previous posts'. I'm passing it on, Idjit. Post #64:

I, at least, had the excuse that I'd missed a post that was posted 1 minute before mine. What's your excuse, moron?

Ya wanna try 90 minutes before yours? Not only can't you read, you can't tell time, either.

[Someone]

Can durpers drink?

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...d.php?t=356329

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Rigmarole, the MELONFARMER who nearly started a riot by spoiling The Force Awakens big time, pits critical1 for constantly misspelling Game of Thrones character names. It does not go as he expects...

Good news for Rigamarole: he's got BigT white-knighting him!

[Someone]

He's upping his game.

I doubt he'll still be there tomorrow.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

You're calling haj dumb? That's a knee slapper.

No. I was calling Moronstern dumb. I quoted Haj's post to show him what he missed. Now I'm calling you dumb, for failing to understand that obvious fact.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

CockRing just bitched me out for the same 'failure to notice previous posts'. I'm passing it on, Idjit. Post #64:

I, at least, had the excuse that I'd missed a post that was posted 1 minute before mine. What's your excuse, moron?

Girls quit it. You're both pretty.

[Someone]

Is Darren Garrison on anybodys radar? He's coming off like a dick in a fun light-hearted thread.

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...3#post20391393

[Someone]

Guy knows how to get some miles between the first word in a sentence and the period.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Fat cunts in uniform.

Toss that before a few of the ladydopers and see who fights and who eats the cookie.

Your sock?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Guy knows how to get some miles between the first word in a sentence and the period.

Hey, punctuation doesn't grow on trees, y'know.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Your sock?

You would be the last to ever know.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

You would be the last to ever know.

You're a misogynistic tool. So naturally I thought of you.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Good news for Rigamarole: he's got BigT white-knighting him!

Posts #72 and 80. Do try and keep up.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Is Darren Garrison on anybodys radar? He's coming off like a dick in a fun light-hearted thread.

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...3#post20391393

The name does sound familiar.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

You're a misogynistic tool. So naturally I thought of you.

You must really have a simple mind, so that doesn't surprise me.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

The name does sound familiar.

I've noticed him. I'm pretty sure he's a previously-banned Doper, but I haven't figured out who (October 2016 join date, and he fit in perfectly from day one).

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

You must really have a simple mind, so that doesn't surprise me.

Yes, you like to tell women that. Carry on with your nasty little self.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Posts #72 and 80. Do try and keep up.

Uh ... well ... you see ... no, YOU try to keep up! I sneer at your ... uh, up-keeping abilities!

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Girls quit it. You're both pretty.

And you're pretty stupid. How you manage to walk and breathe at the same time remains a continual mystery to me.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Is Darren Garrison on anybodys radar? He's coming off like a dick in a fun light-hearted thread.

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...3#post20391393

Let's see... He's on my list as "Darren Garrison -general idiot"...

I'm fully prepared to upgrade him to "-drooling moron".

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

And you're pretty stupid. How you manage to walk and breathe at the same time remains a continual mystery to me.

< mod note >
You and Morgenstern need to take your spat (and all future spats) to a new thread in the Pit or I'll be forced to box you both as needed. Please stop crapping up the Snark thread.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

< mod note >
You and Morgenstern need to take your spat (and all future spats) to a new thread in the Pit or I'll be forced to box you both as needed. Please stop crapping up the Snark thread.

Now this is a problem... Snark on Fenris, or snark on Morgenstern... Business or pleasure? I think, in this case, I'll go for the standard Russian response, and attack the Polish. <Stabs self in abdomen>

Uhh. Maybe that wasn't such a good idea...

[Someone]

Sir T-Cups: What's the proper way to drink out of a Tervis?

Label facing you, or opposite of you?

For those of you (like me) who have never heard of Tervis, it's just an insulated tumbler with a spill proof lid.

Tervis.

Some of them have inserts with a design or logo. Most of the people in the thread never heard of one and don't give a rat's ass and are poking fun at Sir T-Cups for being obsessive about it.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Sir T-Cups: What's the proper way to drink out of a Tervis?

Label facing you, or opposite of you?

For those of you (like me) who have never heard of Tervis, it's just an insulated tumbler with a spill proof lid.

Tervis.

Some of them have inserts with a design or logo. Most of the people in the thread never heard of one and don't give a rat's ass and are poking fun at Sir T-Cups for being obsessive about it.

It's a sippy cup for adults.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

It was Citizen Pained/ Farmer Jane with the Jew-nosed agoraphobic pro-gambler ectopic baby daddy, not Plain Jain.

DAMN IT. I was fairly impressed with myself that I cranked those all out from memory without doing any searches. I guess it was inevitable that I'd fuck one up.

Edit:

nava's got a tendency
to mention that she is from spain
fake ectopic pregnancies are
invented by farmer jane

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Sir T-Cups: What's the proper way to drink out of a Tervis?

Label facing you, or opposite of you?

For those of you (like me) who have never heard of Tervis, it's just an insulated tumbler with a spill proof lid.

Tervis.

Some of them have inserts with a design or logo. Most of the people in the thread never heard of one and don't give a rat's ass and are poking fun at Sir T-Cups for being obsessive about it.

Now he's trying to play the "Wow, I can't believe you all took this so seriously, that's so amusing" card.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

OK, it's only 44 lines about 22 durpers but it's halfway there.

Very nicely played!

[Someone]

Well McNutty, hats off to you again. Here are a couple I came up with. Apologies if they don't fit the meter.

Mr Rik once had a cat
and his wife is such a fright.
Do not forget Charlie Wayne
who up and disappeared one night.

Dangerosa has a son
who is a druggie, shiftless and lazy
while Leo Bloom, idiot,
has a grip on reality that is quite hazy.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Well McNutty, hats off to you again. Here are a couple I came up with. Apologies if they don't fit the meter.

Mr Rik once had a cat
and his wife is such a fright.
Do not forget Charlie Wayne
who up and disappeared one night.

Dangerosa has a son
who is a druggie, shiftless and lazy
while Leo Bloom, idiot,
has a grip on reality that is quite hazy.

The first one's kinda 'meh', but the second gets

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Now he's trying to play the "Wow, I can't believe you all took this so seriously, that's so amusing" card.

Meh, I think he really did mean it in a lighthearted way.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Meh, I think he really did mean it in a lighthearted way.

Maybe initially, when he posted it, but his reaction to the "Meh's" seems to indicate that he casually expected to get a majority agreeing with him, and since he didn't, he's now doubling down on his trivial obsession. He seems upset that everyone thinks it's trivial. I believe it's more important to him than he's letting on.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Dr.Dumbth Internet Tough Guy Espesheal.

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...9&postcount=16

He pulled the same "you can't prove it, so it didn't happen" stuff in a CS thread about The Keepers (the Netflix series about abuse at a Catholic girls' school). I think I mentioned it in last month's snark thread. This seems to be a huge sore point with him (admittedly he has many of those). I didn't noticed him making similar arguments in the Bill Cosby threads, so I'm wondering if this is a personal/religious issue for him. Maybe his father, or some other relative, was a priest.

[Someone]

So Dr Deth is actually asking him to prove coaches have committed sexual abuse, as if there haven't been frequent headlines to that effect and a guy has to delve deep into the back pages of the newspapers for it? Sheesh, just google it.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Maybe initially, when he posted it, but his reaction to the "Meh's" seems to indicate that he casually expected to get a majority agreeing with him, and since he didn't, he's now doubling down on his trivial obsession. He seems upset that everyone thinks it's trivial. I believe it's more important to him than he's letting on.

Sir T-Cups inadvertently poisoned the well when he declared, in the first sentence of his OP, that "most of America" drinks from Tervis cups. Dopers love to announce that they haven't heard of things. And anytime you start a Dope thread with you're all exactly like me, right? it's bound to go off the rails, with Dopers rushing in to declare NO, I AM NOTHING LIKE YOU, I AM UNIQUE. It's the flipside of those "why do people like things I don't like?" threads.

If he had framed his thread as "Hey, I have this goofy OCD quirk about logos on drinkware; how about you?" it might have turned out differently. But no, he went with "Dopers, put down your Tervis cups and answer my poll about how you position the image on your Tervis cups," which is just asking for trouble.

[Someone]

I've seen cups like that and have a couple but didn't know there was a brand with name recognition.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I've seen cups like that and have a couple but didn't know there was a brand with name recognition.

When I clicked that Google image link in the thread, I immediately thought, "Oh, those." I didn't know they had a name. They look like nice cups, but I think they're a bit overpriced.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Sir T-Cups inadvertently poisoned the well when he declared, in the first sentence of his OP, that "most of America" drinks from Tervis cups. Dopers love to announce that they haven't heard of things. And anytime you start a Dope thread with you're all exactly like me, right? it's bound to go off the rails, with Dopers rushing in to declare NO, I AM NOTHING LIKE YOU, I AM UNIQUE. It's the flipside of those "why do people like things I don't like?" threads.

If he had framed his thread as "Hey, I have this goofy OCD quirk about logos on drinkware; how about you?" it might have turned out differently. But no, he went with "Dopers, put down your Tervis cups and answer my poll about how you position the image on your Tervis cups," which is just asking for trouble.

The trouble with framing anything as a harmless OCD quirk over there is that it will quickly devolve into a race to the bottom about who has the quirkiest OCD quirk. "Oh, well I have CDO, which is like OCD except that I have to have the letters in alphabetical order before I can leave the house".

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

If he had framed his thread as "Hey, I have this goofy OCD quirk about logos on drinkware; how about you?" it might have turned out differently.

Yeah, instead it would have been "how dare you conflate OCD which is a serious psychological disorder with your stupid little fussy habits show some consideration you clodpate hurff durff does 'anal retentive' have a hyphen because literally figuratively no one on the internet has heard that one before!!!!!"

........aaaaaaaaand ninja'd by Subfusc.

[Someone]

never mind, quoted instead of edited

[Someone]

Oops. I just volunteered to re-do my mother's church's website. For free. It looks like trash. It looks like Opal did her 'professinal' best at it. Maybe SilverTygerNoun did it. Maybe Nitropress... err.. Avocado Pubarian made that site... Shit, sure, I'll redo it for free. Whomever you paid for that wasn't worth whatever you paid them. I'll do it for free, because those 'professinal's ain't worth shit. All I gotta do is make it look good in Lynx.

And my mother thinks I'm gonna make a reputation for doing that...

She might be right. I might develop a reputation for fixing trash...

On the plus side, at least Opal is dead.

[Someone]

Is the Lynx thing a joke? People still use Lynx?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Is the Lynx thing a joke? People still use Lynx?

No, it's not a joke. It's a 'usability' thing. If it'll work in 'Lynx', It'll work in anything. Make it work regardless of the browser your 'mark' shows up with.

I'm gonna make a church website work. I'm starting out with one hand tied behind my back. And then, all I gotta do is beat Opal. And she's fucking dead.

[Someone]

I suppose a simple clean page featuring an index up front and a site map at the bottom would be totally out of the question.

[Someone]

Since Lynx ignores CSS there are plenty of ways to fuck up a web page for virtually all browsers but look fine in Lynx.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Well McNutty, hats off to you again. Here are a couple I came up with. Apologies if they don't fit the meter.

Mr Rik once had a cat
and his wife is such a fright.
Do not forget Charlie Wayne
who up and disappeared one night.

Dangerosa has a son
who is a druggie, shiftless and lazy
while Leo Bloom, idiot,
has a grip on reality that is quite hazy.

Goddamn it did you even listen to the song?!? Fifteen syllables per couplet, motherfucker. Either 8/7 or 7/8. You got it on the Charlie one but the others are a disaster.

</anal>

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Since Lynx ignores CSS...

And let's do the same. A simple HTML page of text, links, and photos would be just fine.

[Someone]

I don't see any reason not to present all information in black Times New Roman on a white background, left justified. You get bold, italics and paragraph breaks. Hyperlinks are allowed, so long as they are blue. Jury is still out on images.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I don't see any reason not to present all information in black Times New Roman on a white background, left justified. You get bold, italics and paragraph breaks. Hyperlinks are allowed, so long as they are blue. Jury is still out on images.

You just described the derp.