Durp Snark XIII: Triskadurpaphobia

[Someone]

Lucky #13. Enter, if you dare!

[Someone]

scary. But after the demon I summoned this afternoon . . .

http://www.sacred-texts.com/grim/bcm/bcm55.htm

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Lucky #13. Enter, if you dare!

You do realize Fenris applied for Admin position just to have the privilege to close and open snark threads? It's not the action itself it's the privilege he was after. And now you ruined it all for him.

[Someone]

Cown Prince of Irony's meltown is fucking hilarious. There's been reasonable discussion back and forth about servers responsibilities vs parents' need for watchfulness, a few statistical outliers going "HURR SHOULDN'T TAKE BRATS TO RESTAURANTS" but they've mostly been ignored.

THEN THE CRAZY, YOU BABY-HATING CUNTS.

Then BigTard comes along to tell people off again.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

You do realize Fenris applied for Admin position just to have the privilege to close and open snark threads? It's not the action itself it's the privilege he was after. And now you ruined it all for him.

It's true. They have.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I'm going to keep posting in here until some right bastard closes it.

Originally Posted by Someone

New thread. This one's locked.

Damn, I'm good.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Cown Prince of Irony's meltown is fucking hilarious. There's been reasonable discussion back and forth about servers responsibilities vs parents' need for watchfulness, a few statistical outliers going "HURR SHOULDN'T TAKE BRATS TO RESTAURANTS" but they've mostly been ignored.

THEN THE CRAZY, YOU BABY-HATING CUNTS.

Then BigTard comes along to tell people off again.

BigT always reminds me of Neil from The Young Ones:

Neil: Guys, listen to us. Arguing! Bickering! Fighting! We never used to be like this.

Vyvyan: Yes, we did.

[Someone]

That's impossible. Neil is much, much more likeable than BigTard ever could be.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Then BigTard comes along to tell people off again.

There's a wrong side of the sidewalk for walking?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Then BigTard comes along to tell people off again.

He also wants MPSIMS to be even MPSIMS-ier, if that were possible.

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...3&postcount=10

[Someone]

Ahem...here in Michigan, your car insurance pays every penny for medical expenses in the event of an accident no matter who is at fault. This is, of course, in regards to rigs post re: Jamie McCarryme near the end of the last thread.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

There's a wrong side of the sidewalk for walking?

I dont know what BigT's been talking about. But, yes, there's a wrong side of the sidewalk, like there's a wrong side of the escalator, or like there's a time to let people get out of the subway/train/bus before you step in. In my dictature, people not doing this properly would be repeatedly executed.
Till they understand.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

There's a wrong side of the sidewalk for walking?

The underside.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Cown Prince of Irony's meltown is fucking hilarious. There's been reasonable discussion back and forth about servers responsibilities vs parents' need for watchfulness, a few statistical outliers going "HURR SHOULDN'T TAKE BRATS TO RESTAURANTS" but they've mostly been ignored.

THEN THE CRAZY, YOU BABY-HATING CUNTS.

Then BigTard comes along to tell people off again.

Holy shit. Some needs to stay away from Starbucks for awhile. I mean, damn.


Brian -- your link doesn't work.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I dont know what BigT's been talking about. But, yes, there's a wrong side of the sidewalk, like there's a wrong side of the escalator, or like there's a time to let people get out of the subway/train/bus before you step in. In my dictature, people not doing this properly would be repeatedly executed.
Till they understand.

I'm usually diligent about which side I choose, but when I'm staggering home after closing time it's enough of an effort just to stay on the path. Anyone who bumps into me gets a technicolor yawn for a greeting.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Cown Prince of Irony's meltown is fucking hilarious. There's been reasonable discussion back and forth about servers responsibilities vs parents' need for watchfulness, a few statistical outliers going "HURR SHOULDN'T TAKE BRATS TO RESTAURANTS" but they've mostly been ignored.

THEN THE CRAZY, YOU BABY-HATING CUNTS.

Then BigTard comes along to tell people off again.

He done went all Beryl Mooncalf on their asses.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

He done went all Beryl Mooncalf on their asses.

He's like the anti-Quasi

FUCK ALL YALL

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

You do realize Fenris applied for Admin position just to have the privilege to close and open snark threads? It's not the action itself it's the privilege he was after. And now you ruined it all for him.

Well, duh, why do you think I keep doing it

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

You do realize Fenris applied for Admin position just to have the privilege to close and open snark threads? It's not the action itself it's the privilege he was after. And now you ruined it all for him.

Wait, he applied? All this time I'd thought there was some vBulletin zero-day that he'd exploited. Giraffe just never did anything about it because he secretly likes those horrible smilies.

[Someone]

Broomstick says in the gym thread:

I do not bow to bullies in any way

I wonder how many showers she took after that thread, though. The whole exchange about her husband being told flat out that he couldn't join a gym because he walks funny was irritating, yet funny.
He was told flat out!! Well, that's the gist of what they said...

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Cown Prince of Irony's meltown is fucking hilarious. There's been reasonable discussion back and forth about servers responsibilities vs parents' need for watchfulness, a few statistical outliers going "HURR SHOULDN'T TAKE BRATS TO RESTAURANTS" but they've mostly been ignored.

THEN THE CRAZY, YOU BABY-HATING CUNTS.

Then BigTard comes along to tell people off again.

He definitely should have been warned for that simply for saying fuck you to two people who weren't even in the thread. A mod note is something that I think is useful for when someone forgets what forum they're in or just gets a touch overheated. When someone says "I'm doing this fully knowing I am wrong" and you give them a note? YaY consistency!

After he melted down I tried to remember who he was since he accused me of ruining some of his threads before. I looked back at all the threads he's started there and I haven't posted in a single one so obviously he's a bit off.

The most pathetic thing about that thread, to me, is that it's all easily solved by USING YOUR WORDS. So many doper issues come down to simple human interaction.

I don't have a kid and if my friends and I are out to eat we try to clear a space before our food comes. Why not do the same for junior? Also, if the waiter says "Careful, this plate is hot" it's pretty easy to use that big hole in the middle of your face where food is stuffed to say "Ok, let's not put it in front of the baby then. Let's set it here." and indicate where you want it to be put. CRISIS AVERTED and maybe the next time they are delivering food they'll remember to avoid the area around the baby.

Nah, it's easier to go on the straight dope and talk about how stupid OTHER PEOPLE are.

[Someone]

OK, I start reading the new one, but nobody wants to snark on my target. I'm going to shit it out, here, and maybe tomorrow I'll read what came before.

Broomhilda pisses me of with this one.

Originally Posted by Someone

My spouse has a couple pounds of surgically implanted metal in his right leg. It always sets off metal detectors. Despite being manually wanded and patted-down, and not posing a threat, he has been refused boarding on occassion.

How is that bullshit? Let me count the ways. My own leg thread shows just as much hardware. But I don't get nearly the bullshit she claims. But call her on that blatantly obvious bullshit will get me banned if I do it in GD, where she's posting her butthurt bullshit. I really wish this bitch's husband would just fucking die, so we don't have to tip-toe around her obvious, and ridiculous, bullshit.

Bitch be whacked. Word... But that's the Durp for you....

[Someone]

An actually disabled person being refused boarding based on a metal detector reading for hardware in his leg?

Oh bull fucking shit. Whatever the American Disabilities people are, they'd have a fucking field day with that one. And Broomstick is just the sort of person to drag it up to them, so I call fucking shenanigans on that.

She's a lying bitch.

And Quasimodem is in full-on dribble-mode in the Twickster thread again. Jeez Louise.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Jeez Louise.

[Someone]

You're JEAN Louise, not JEEZ Louise Jeez Louise is someone completely different.

And for some reason, my fingers keep tying Lousie.

[Someone]

Hee! MissJeezLouise

[Someone]

You guys DO realize that she chose the name Broomstick because that's where she obviously keeps hers lodged. Right? Anyone?

nevermind...

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Brian -- your link doesn't work.

Does this work? Testing...

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...3&postcount=10

[Someone]

That one works, Brian.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Broomstick says in the gym thread:

I wonder how many showers she took after that thread, though. The whole exchange about her husband being told flat out that he couldn't join a gym because he walks funny was irritating, yet funny.
He was told flat out!! Well, that's the gist of what they said...

I get the very strong impression with Broomstick that at some level she is projecting her own feelings about her husband, all that " what are you doing saddled with a no-good hoppity half-a-man cripple?" stuff, onto everybody else she meets.

[Someone]

haha! go look at gq over there. someone is resurrecting the oldest threads on they got. smells like socks everywhere.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

BigT always reminds me of Neil from The Young Ones:

Neil: Guys, listen to us. Arguing! Bickering! Fighting! We never used to be like this.

Vyvyan: Yes, we did.

That was Rick, not Neil. And (P)Rick is probably a more apt comparison anyway, what with BigT's whole anarchist-tinged TVTropes rant.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I get the very strong impression with Broomstick that at some level she is projecting her own feelings about her husband, all that " what are you doing saddled with a no-good hoppity half-a-man cripple?" stuff, onto everybody else she meets.

Yes.

[Someone]

Has she ever said precisely what's wrong with him? I honestly wouldn't be surprised if his problems bother her more than they do him.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Has she ever said precisely what's wrong with him?

Yes.

[Someone]

no durposit no durpurn

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Wow, I am pleased to read something in a message board, that as far as I can determine is actually accurate! And by 'accurate' I mean this is the same determination that I came to myself! Jamie, as a young callow youth (weren't we all at some point?) was driving somewhat under the influence, wrapped his car around a tree and the subsequent surgery unfortunately resulted in his disability.

I think most of us managed to 'get away with' driving drunk in our youth, so I have an issue with condemning Jamie for the unfortunate results. Most of us were luckier. That doesn't mean he's not an asshole, it just means that I will not throw up in his face the unfortunate incident that resulted in his disability. "there but for the grace of god' - and I don't even believe in god!

Which I guess just means...seriously, people??? seriously? You never drove drunk and 'got away with it?'

Because if you did...ever...drive drunk and got away with it - you got no damn business ragging on jamie for that. Rag on him for being an asshole if you want...but...'let he who is without sin cast the first stone.'

Speaking for myself, I am not without sin. But I got away with it...]

Not sure what the protocol with quoting stuff from the previously closed thread is, but I had to comment on this.

Perhaps it is a cultural thing (where I live versus where you do), but I have never driven drunk and none of my friends do. Driving under the influence rates very, VERY highly on my arsehole-o-meter and I have absolutely no time for anyone that does it. Full stop.

[Someone]

I have also never driven drunk. It's something that isn't that difficult to accomplish.

[Someone]

Congrats to those who have never had a drink or two (depending on your body that can be enough to blow over the legal limit) and driven anywhere. I suppose you've never been a speeder or passed in a no passing zone or done a u-turn where it isn't allowed or driven while talking on your cell phone or while tired or just plain made a mistake driving. You can easily hurt yourself or someone else while driving, you don't have to be drunk. So while it feels good to be able to sniff "I would NEVER do something like Jamie did!" I know you've done at least one of those things I've listed. If you say you haven't you're either a liar or you've never driven a car.

I honest to God hope that none of you has to pay for the rest of your life for a decision that you make on your worst day.

Hate him all you want but the JamieMcCarryMe nickname and the glee some of you take while using it makes me wonder if you were raised by shit throwing howler monkeys.

Of course I post in these threads too, so I'm not an angel. I just don't get why people seem so obsessed with this guy's every move and having a 3rd grade level nickname for someone who is disabled.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Congrats to those who have never had a drink or two (depending on your body that can be enough to blow over the legal limit) and driven anywhere. I suppose you've never been a speeder or passed in a no passing zone or done a u-turn where it isn't allowed or driven while talking on your cell phone or while tired or just plain made a mistake driving.

All I was doing was disputing the statement that most of us have driven drunk. I don't know that that's true. It doesn't make me superior to anyone particularly because the reason for it is that I think that all alcoholic beverages taste like crap so I haven't hardly been in a situation where I might have driven drunk in the first place and I have done many of the other things on your list.

So we have me and Dead Deer who claim to have never driven drunk. Have either one of us snarked on Jamie or used that nickname? I know for certain that I haven't.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

All I was doing was disputing the statement that most of us have driven drunk.

Frankly, it's probably closer to the truth than you realise.

The attitude that drunk drivers deserve to be pariahs is relatively recent. The first steps in evolving to the current attitude came in my lifetime. Someone older than me is likely to have driven drunk before it became a stigma. (The year I passed my test, Dad asked me to drive him to his sister's for Christmas Day drinks, because he was concerned that he might get pulled up - my uncle had a generous hand with the whisky). This was a change from previous years attitude.

Ellipses has confessed to being in late middle age iirc, so she probably learned to drive in an era when there was less pressure to monitor drinking before driving.

So before you say "it's not difficult" stop and reflect that the past is a different country with a different culture.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

All I was doing was disputing the statement that most of us have driven drunk. I don't know that that's true. It doesn't make me superior to anyone particularly because the reason for it is that I think that all alcoholic beverages taste like crap so I haven't hardly been in a situation where I might have driven drunk in the first place and I have done many of the other things on your list.

So we have me and Dead Deer who claim to have never driven drunk. Have either one of us snarked on Jamie or used that nickname? I know for certain that I haven't.

I'm sorry it came off like I was specifically just saying you and Dead Deer. Obviously I snark here with everyone, but something just really gets to me when I see people (many I really like) using that nickname and pass it off as ok because he brought it on himself.

Most of us bring bad stuff on ourselves. Some of those bad things are temporary while some of them are permanent. For some people they're fatal.

[Someone]

He doesn't get a free ride for being obnoxious just because he's in a wheelchair.

[Someone]

As I've said before; he didn't deserve it, but he's responsible for it.

I treat, consider and talk about him the same way I do anyone I think is a cunt, an asshole or an utter prick. His disability is core to how he interacts with the world, to how he holds others in contempt for not kowtowing to his desires. So that's what my irritation focuses on. I'm not snarking and making fun of him because he's disabled, I'm doing it because he's an asshole who tries to use his disability as a weapon to force others to dance to his tune.

Fuck that noise.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

As I've said before; he didn't deserve it, but he's responsible for it.

I treat, consider and talk about him the same way I do anyone I think is a cunt, an asshole or an utter prick. His disability is core to how he interacts with the world, to how he holds others in contempt for not kowtowing to his desires. So that's what my irritation focuses on. I'm not snarking and making fun of him because he's disabled, I'm doing it because he's an asshole who tries to use his disability as a weapon to force others to dance to his tune.

Fuck that noise.

Also, if he didn't happen to end up disabled himself, he's the type of asshole who'd treat people in wheelchairs like total nonentities. I can just smell it. It's why he's so defensive about it, because he knows that and hates himself for it. There's an undercurrent of desperation in his level of assholish assertiveness, because he thinks the average person thinks the way he did prior to his accident. He's afraid of being invisible, but only because he would have viewed a disabled person as invisible before he himself was disabled. Why else the antics that land him in the newspaper, the bodybuilding, and messageboard fuckery?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I suppose you've never been a speeder or passed in a no passing zone or done a u-turn where it isn't allowed or driven while talking on your cell phone or while tired or just plain made a mistake driving.

Not all these are like the others. Being over the limit is as bad as texting while driving and being falling-asleep tired and probably as bad as continuously chatting on the phone, but having a short conversation or going 5 mph over or making a u turn when no one is around is much safer. After all the vast majority of car accidents in America involve impaired driving in one of the three categories (drunk, phone, tired,) so if you don't do any of the three, then yes, you can cast stones.

ETA: texting is actually worse, per minute, than being drunk.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Congrats to those who have never had a drink or two (depending on your body that can be enough to blow over the legal limit) and driven anywhere.

Maybe I'm weird but a drink or two doesn't make me drunk. Hell, I'm not even sure if I qualify as tipsy. And the claim was very definitely "drunk".

But even then, I've always had a policy of not even one drink if I am driving. I just don't see the point in risking anything.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

So before you say "it's not difficult" stop and reflect that the past is a different country with a different culture.

But how long ago was this accident?

I'm 37 and drunk drivers have been social pariahs pretty much my entire life. I've grown up with quite hard hitting PSAs about drunk driving and random police stops at Christmas/New Year.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

But how long ago was this accident?

I'm 37 and drunk drivers have been social pariahs pretty much my entire life. I've grown up with quite hard hitting PSAs about drunk driving and random police stops at Christmas/New Year.

It is a "time" thing. Back when I was arrested in 1986 (and I was well over the limit at .18), you basically got a slap on the wrist (DumDum School and 6 month suspension and a token fine). Shortly afterwards the "punishment" got tougher, and the culture changed.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Hate him all you want but the JamieMcCarryMe nickname and the glee some of you take while using it makes me wonder if you were raised by shit throwing howler monkeys.
<snip>
having a 3rd grade level nickname for someone who is disabled.

I thought is was in reference to his being carried to the toilet on planes (or so he claimed to be).