I've never successfully maintained a blog for any extended period of time. However, because I am a sufferer of mental health problems, I feel it is my duty to at least attempt to share my situation and help to do my part (all be it ever so small) to edge our society away from stigmatizing us.

I don't know how well I'll do chronicling my daily struggles here, but I'll certainly be committed to giving it my best shot. Along the way, if it only assists even just one person, any fallout will be worth it and, at the end of the day, if there's comfort / support / aid / whatever to be had, it'll definitely make life better for me as well.

Sometimes just knowing you're not alone is enough. Here you are most emphatically not and if you ever need someone to only listen, please feel free to email me. Because I'm glad you've stopped by and you are always welcome. Via this, maybe we can all make it to a brighter, more functional day. So read on my brothers and sisters....

Forever peace,

Kemi~
faithfool@gmail.com
Social Group: Unsanity

Rate this Entry

Anxiety Sucks

Posted 27th May 2009 at 02:52 PM by joyfool

Giraffiti anxiety, depression

And I'm down again. I'm not sure why or what I'm doing wrong (for example, I've stuck to my 'routine' today and put in a couple of hours at the Senior center), so what I need to improve, or how, is escaping me at the moment.

I feel like I need a life overhaul, but that's what I just had through the outpatient program. If only there was some way to completely reboot my system, I'd be on board with that no matter what the cost (like say, ECT or what-have-you).

Now I'm on this rollercoaster that makes no sense and I don't want to wear out my welcome here or in the group. Hopefully everyone can forgive / ignore me until this either settles down or becomes a non-issue.

Sorry y'all.

Kemi~

Posted in Halo of Whys

Views 15201 Comments 6

« Prev Main Next »

Total Comments 6

Comments

	Anxiety does suck, and so does the anxiety of "am I getting sick again?" To this day, if something upsets me, and I dwell on it too long, I will find myself worrying that I am obsessing about it. The difference is NOW I can calm myself down and get my mind on other things. Hang in there, life gets better, I promise.
	Posted 28th May 2009 at 02:12 AM by GreyCloud9

Don't give up, Kemi, whatever you do... sometimes you hit a rut, and that's okay.

Question: aside from the fact that you're currently trying to regain normalcy in your life (yay!)... is there anything else bugging you that you are aware of? I mean, shoot, just trying to get well is big enough in and of itself. You're doing a good job on that front (and IANAD, but I would think that having some down times would be part of the process that you have to learn to work through. You're getting there!).

You just got back from a STRESSFUL visit with your momz. Hell, it's only been a week and a half, right? It takes time to settle down, sometimes a bit longer than others. That's okay - just don't let that shit take you over, right? Yeah.

And what GreyCloud said is good: anxiety of "am I getting sick again?" Woof. Truer words, girl.

Posted 28th May 2009 at 04:31 AM by Dazzling White Diamonds Dazzling White Diamonds is offline

I myself have been having some unexplained anxiety the past few days, so you're not alone Nakama.

Maybe you could borrow a cue from John Nash in "A Beautiful Mind", which I only saw for the first, second, and third times a few days ago (New favorite movie). John said, "Like a diet of the mind, I choose not to indulge in certain appetites".

... I know it's not that simple, but maybe it's something to think about. It's working for me.

::Sets down a pen at my Nakama's table::

Take a pen, pretend I just gave it to you, and always keep it on you. Whenever you're down, remember, the pen represents the Ben. :-) ... Wow that was cheesy.

Hang in there, XO
~B

P.S.: Wrote you an e-mail, asking a favor. But take your time.

Posted 28th May 2009 at 04:34 AM by Blinus Blinus is offline

	I know you all are right. I'll give it some more time and ignore these feelings that I know aren't right. It's just so difficult when you've tried so hard NOT to land in this place, yet here I am. Anyway, thank you so much for caring. Hopefully this brief stint of setbacks will pass soon.
	Posted 28th May 2009 at 11:01 AM by joyfool

I don't have anything helpful to add to the wise words above - I'm a bit roller-coaster-ey (yes it's a word, hush

) myself these days. But I wanted to let you know you weren't on your own, and that you're not going to "wear out your welcome" because you're having a rough time - we don't like you despite your problems, we like you whether you're having problems or not, so you shouldn't worry about suddenly boring us because you have too many problems. Won't happen.

I'll stop rambling now, I can tell I'm not making sense

Posted 29th May 2009 at 09:25 AM by Nicole Nicole is offline

	Thanks Nicole. Things are slightly looking up, so I'm just gonna run with it. And you always make sense.
	Posted 31st May 2009 at 08:34 AM by joyfool

Archive
< May 2025
Su	Mo	Tu	We	Th	Fr	Sa
20	21	22	23	24	25	26
27	28	29	30	1	2	3
4	5	6	7	8	9	10
11	12	13	14	15	16	17
18	19	20	21	22	23	24
25	26	27	28	29	30	31

vBulletin Message

Cancel Changes