Men just don't understand...
 

Thank you jali. So often, when men are talking about their dicks, I'm left thinking "I have no where I would like for that to go." I got physical and aesthetic considerations I'm dealing with here.

Size: Really, too big, is just, too big. Just scares me.
Girth: see above
Duration: There is only so much time I can tolerate having my tender bits assaulted, even in a good way.

Maybe I'm Goldilocks, but guys, really, what you guys dream of, rarely ever elicits any feeling from me other than "Not with my toys."

Don't worry, reality will keep you safe.

Same here Auntbeast. I can imagine that at one point (even during the first hour) that i would also get bored.

Honestly that is where I am a lot of times. I have a tender and inverted cervix. If you are too long and don't know how to use it, I am going to have to take serious meds for the pain. I love sex, but eventually yes, I want to get on with my day.
What really gets me is that if a guy is smaller HE usually gets more pleasure.. I am told that larger guys usually never get to dip in all the way, and the pleasure is less. That, and to be honest doing oral on a guy that is less long or girthy is so much easier.

I'm up (pun intended) for the four hour sex-a-thon! :wow: There's no way I'd rather spend my time. Started in my mid 30's and just never wore off. Thank you for the high testosterone level, even if it means dealing with the facial hair. :barf:
I had very large babies, to which I attribute my lack of concern over large or thick.
But for oral, smaller IS better. More fun, and easier! :jaw:

Thirty to fourty-five minutes should (90% of the time) be enough time for foreplay through both of us experiencing climax. On rare occasions, a sex marathon occurs, but it really isn't normal or necessary. I'm lucky, though, because I've had twenty five years with my wife to figure out exactly what is needed, and we're only forty so we can enjoy the fruits of that knowledge (many years of on-again/off-again before we tied the knot).

Four hours? Er.

Four hours? Maybe with a movie in between.

A sexy movie.

BTW, ladies. I'm most heartened to hear the comments above about oral sex.

No way, the monsters are a challenge! :D

I imagine bufftabby can unhinge her jaw like a python.

:facepalm:

I really hope you don't think men dream of are 4 hour boners.

Given that the oft-retold joke is that guys are done with sex before women, I'm not sure there's much need for worry about multi-hour thrusting marathons.

Watch out for the fangs.

Although that would make for a more interesting animal combination than her current image, I think.

Probably depends on the guy, if you think about it.

I didn't want to point that out. :)

FTFY.

That reminds me of a story, but what doesn't? I'm spoilering it to mitigate the hijackyness.

A new store that sells husbands has just opened in Las Vegas, where a woman can go to choose a husband for marriage. At the entrance to the store is a description of how the store operates. You may visit the store ONLY ONE TIME! There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, one catch …. you may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building! So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband for marriage. On the first floor the sign on the door reads: These men have jobs and love the Lord. She then proceeds to the 2nd floor: The sign on floor 2 reads: These men have jobs, love the Lord, and love kids. She then proceeds to the 3rd floor: The sign on floor 3 reads: These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, and are extremely good looking. “Wow,” she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She then proceeds to the 4th floor: The sign on floor 4 reads: These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop- dead good looking and help with the housework. “Oh, my goodness!” She exclaims, “I can hardly stand it!” Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads: These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak. She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads: You are visitor 4,763,011 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.

Hey now! Even Goldilocks found porridge that was just right. For the record, in the interest of marital harmony, I did finally reveal to my husband that he was pushing the limit of acceptable size. I don't think he's ever been happier.

Goldilocks, indeed.

Heh. 'pushing the limit'. Never heard it called that, before.

Guys can get sore and chafey too, ya know. Just not as quickly, and we're less likely to admit it. In lots of ways, we view the cock as a weapon. Like the old saying,

The penis, mightier than the sword!

4 hours!!! Man, it takes me just 12 minutes to do the dirty deed, smoked the traditional post-coital cigarette and eat a pizza. I won't know what to do from the remaining 3 hr 48 m. ;)

Four hours can be long enough for sex plus the ensuing nap.

For what it's worth, I've never had a four-hour erection; nor would I care to.

You know how some (but clearly not all) antidepressants claim a "low risk of sexual side effects"? I used to think they meant that on many happy pills Mr. Happy won't get up. No. . . the side effect is anorgasmia. Mr. Happy gets up and won't get back down. So yeah, multi-hour thrusting marathons can ensue. And despite what the song lyrics claim, it's not always that fun to go all night long for either party.

No, no it isn't. I've had that side effect, I can't remember which med or combo I ran across in my quest to find the perfect anti-seizure med, but that wasn't it. Fortunately we were both mature enough to quickly realize "This ain't happening tonight, babe.", and be OK with it.

I think it may have been a combination of Zonegran and Phenobarbital.

Hubby had to have emergency spinal surgery a couple years back. One of the side effects of his pinched spinal cord was the inability to ejaculate. We went a week having sex for over an hour every day. I don't remember being upset about the sex, or being overly sore... but I do in fact remember being frustrated that no matter what I did, he didn't get his.

Conversely, I used to date a woman who was able to achieve orgasm before me, usually within minutes after we started making the beast with two backs. I was too inexperienced to understand not all women were that way. I like to think I've evolved from that point, but once I get started all reason flies out the window. To date, I've never engaged in marathon sex, unless you count stopping for breaks in between.

I've never experienced the dreaded or much-joked-about side effect to the V-pill. It works pretty much as advertised. As men age, it actually takes them longer to achieve engage mode and much longer to reach the crucial moment. ED aids aren't so much designed to get you there as they are to keep you there long enough to get the deed done.

At my age, however, there are other things we have to worry about ... leg cramps, pulled muscles, heat exhaustion, those kinds of things. We schedule hydration breaks and have protein snacks within reach should we need them. It's a nice way to while away Sunday afternoon.

Yes indeed. What you once did all night now takes all night to do once.


Once a king, always a king, but once a knight is enough.

I'm thinking Arthas Stewart.

You know, a lot of our common insults used to have meanings much more closely related to the word. ie. A jerk, in the 1920s, meant someone who masturbated too much.

I wonder if this is the origin of 'being a dick'.

Wouldn't the required hospital trip put a damper on the mood?

Just thinking about having a 4 hour erection makes my back hurt.

Oh who was the comedian.. I can't remember.

Anyway he said something to the effect of "If you have erections lasting more than four hours call a doctor? Call a doctor? Fuck that! I'm calling a hooker!"

I don't remember the comedian either but I do recognize the joke. Joe Rogan maybe?