My sister has died

[Baker]

Last Sunday Sis was fine, or so we thought. On Monday she and BIL went on a trip to Branson, but came back Wednesday becuase of headaches and nausea she developed. Friday morning she was unable to be wakened, so BIL and my nephew took her to the ER. Cat scans and MRI showed a large, agressive brain tumor that was already in both hemispheres of her brain. She was pronounced dead on Saturday, less than five days after she started to feel bad. Tonight, at midnight, she will do into surgery as an organ donor, and perhaps six people will live because of Sis, or at least have better lives for a while.

She's in Heaven now, but we will miss her so. Sis was the youngest of us three girls, only sixty years old. My mother has said her worst fear was having one of us die before her, and now it's come to pass.BIL is taking it so hard, and I dont blame him. They at least had thrity two years together.

I've been so calm it worries me. I haven't even cried at all. Maybe it's just that it seems so unreal. If God was the sort that makes bargains I'd giive my life for her in exchange, but that's not an option.

CANCER SUCKS!!!

[What Exit?]

I'm sorry Baker, I saw the cancer sucks thread and had nothing to say. This was unbelievably quick.

I'm at a loss for words.

[JackieLikesVariety]

I'm so sorry, what a terrible shock.

[Oxirane]

I'm so sorry, Baker, thoughts and prayers for you and your family.

[SmartAleq]

What a gut punch, I'm so sorry for you and your family. I'm sending thoughts of strength and peace in your direction and feel free to come bend our internet ears as needed. We're here for you.

[BJMoose]

My deep sympathy. A sudden death like this is much more difficult to deal with. Hang in there.

[Rock]

That's awful, Baker. I'm so sorry.

[NoClueBoy]

So sorry...

[Monstera deliciosa]

Baker, I am so sorry for your loss.

[Random Precision]

Baker, I am also very sorry for your loss. It is very difficult to lose a sibling at any age, but especially one younger than you.
And don't stress about your feelings not being what you expect. It's been 3 years since my brother died unexpectedly of pancreatic cancer and I'm still dealing with my feelings over that. It will happen when it needs to happen for you.

[Rat Diva]

Originally Posted by Random Precision

Baker, I am also very sorry for your loss. It is very difficult to lose a sibling at any age, but especially one younger than you.
And don't stress about your feelings not being what you expect. It's been 3 years since my brother died unexpectedly of pancreatic cancer and I'm still dealing with my feelings over that. It will happen when it needs to happen for you.

Right on. Everyone processes things differently, so give yourself all the time you need.

Much love and sympathy to you and your family

Cancer mega-sucks

[Wolf Larsen]

That is very sad and a huge shock for it to go that fast.

[Helena]

I'm so sorry, Baker. At least it was quick for her, although that makes it more difficult for the people left behind. Hugs.

[Flying Saucerian]

[Borborygmi]

Deepest sympathies to you and your family, Baker.

[Dazzling White Diamonds]

Baker, I am so very sorry to hear this.

[Pure]

I am so very sorry. May her memory be for a blessing.

[eleanorigby]

I am so sorry. It must feel surreal now, because it was so sudden. Sometimes it feels like there's a big eraser in the sky that just comes and lands on the people we love. I don't doubt you're still in shock with grief still to come (...as if any of this is linear and you can't feel 15 emotions all at the same time, most of them contradictory).

Be very kind and patient with yourself. This is like losing a limb.

[Rebo]

Oh God, Baker. What a horrendous thing to happen to her and your family. I'm so sorry. We're here if you need a shoulder to cry on.

Cancer does suck giant donkey balls.

[running coach]

Peace, Baker, for you and your family.

[Solfy]

I'm so sorry, Baker. What a beautiful gift she was able to leave, both as an organ donor and in her loving relationships.
Be easy on yourself.

[Baker]

Originally Posted by Solfy

I'm so sorry, Baker. What a beautiful gift she was able to leave, both as an organ donor and in her loving relationships.
Be easy on yourself.

Yes, if there is one good thing in all this it's the lives she will have helped. Someone will breathe because of her, someone will see, or will be able to get off dialysis. Someone will live because her heart will beat for them.

[Doyle]

That is sad. Sorry for your loss.

[Jaglavak]

I'm sorry about your sister, Baker. What a bolt from the blue.

[hajario]

How horrible and tragic. I’m so sorry.

[JimNightshade]

I am so sorry Baker - I missed this.
I lost my mum to this evil a couple of years back - I know how you are feeling.

What to say? Nothing will make it better.

Just know that however dark it is just now, trust me that light will return.

When it does, the memories of smiles will take over, and the pain will go away.

It may take a while - but I do hope you will take the journey, and come back on the other side of the tunnel, see the light, feel the breeze, treasure them old photographs, accept, smile, feel the peace and move on.

it took me a few years, I hope your journey will be quicker.

I dunno what more to say. Hang in there - trust me, that darkness will will slowly dissipate, and slowly the sun will shine through, and as you accept this new stage of life, it will all be ok.

I know it is a journey. Go. Do not stay in the past. Go.

And feel free to shout your frustrations at me, call me an ass. Thats ok. Don't keep it in.

Anyway, that is just my advise. I hope this does not anger you, for that is not my intention. Far from it.

[Inna Minnit]

So sad and sudden. I am glad she was able to donate organs to pass her legacy on. Peace to your whole family.

[3acres]

I'm so sorry, Baker.

[Pogo]

My sympathies to you and your family, Baker.

[Beadalin]

Thinking of you and your family, Baker.

[Wouk]

Originally Posted by Baker

CANCER SUCKS!!!

Yes, it does. My sympathies to you and kudos to your sister for being an organ donor.

[FairyChatMom]

How sad! I'm so sorry for your loss. But how wonderful for those who may live on because of her generous decision. Hugs to you and the rest of the family - I wish you all peace.

[Detroit Hoser]

I'm so sorry, Baker. Holding you and your family in my heart.

[silenus]

My deepest sympathies, Baker.

[thylacine]

Word of your loss has spread to the Unaboard and all there send their sympathy and best wishes at this dreadful time. You are in the thoughts of many more folks than you probably know care about you.

[taters]

I am so sorry to read this, Baker. Please accept my deepest condolences.

[teela brown]

My sympathy goes to you and yours, Baker.

[Baker]

Because of scheduling conflicts between the cemetery, the funeral home and the pastor's obligations, the visitation will not be until Sunday afternoon, and the funeral will be Monday morning. Today the funeral will be planned, and my BIL and I will go to the cemetery office to sign the papers signing over a family plot to him. Thursday through Saturday I have nothing to do, so I may actually, as strange as it sounds, put in some time at work in the next two days. Otherwise I'd just be moping around and eating junk food. BIL says that's fine with him. We met yesterday at the funeral home to get all the planning made. Geez, coffins can be expensive, I remember that from when we picked one out for my dad six years ago. I have instructions with my other sister, that when the time comes for me I want the cheapest box they have, what John Does get put in. To me it's sinful to spend a lot of money on a coffin.

Again I want to thank everyone for their words of kindness. I can't express how much it means to me.

[Baker]

my sister's funeral, and burial, was today. Still doesn't seem real. And tomorrow I will go back to work.

[JackieLikesVariety]

Originally Posted by Baker

my sister's funeral, and burial, was today. Still doesn't seem real. And tomorrow I will go back to work.

[Helena]

It's the first day of a new normal. In some ways it's harder than the rush getting things done right after the person dies.

Hugs.

[Rebo]