Snark FM 105: the Durp

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

༼ つ ◕_ ◕ ༽つ Give rankings

I dig your art-work.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I dig your art-work.

Shamelessly copied from reddit.

[Someone]

Oops, Ravid's gotten himself suspended.

[Someone]

The Trumpists' barely contained glee over poor Mollie Tibbets being murdered is disgusting.

It's probably justified though. I'm sure this will rile up the base, who are dim or racist enough that they don't or won't figure out that a random selection of 11 million people is going to contain some murderers and rapists.

Thought about posting in that thread, but don't have the stomach for it yet.

https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb...d.php?t=860873

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Please don't be gross. This sort of stuff makes women feel unwelcome. It's also stupid and creepy.

Thank you for this.

[Someone]

Seconded.

[Someone]

HurricaneDitka proves that he definitely reads, but is too cowardly to participate, in his Pit thread: https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb...d.php?t=860923

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

HurricaneDitka proves that he definitely reads, but is too cowardly to participate, in his Pit thread: https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb...d.php?t=860923

"I'm too good to defend myself in the pit where people might be mean to me"

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Okay I see your point

Evidently not.

Fuck off you stupid pathetic cowardly cunts. I've been "behaving well". I'm not a child you useless peice of shit.

Actually the remainder of this pretty much proves you are indeed a child (whatever chronological real age) and a fairly boring pathetic twit.

Originally Posted by Someone

Pathetic Troll Is Pathetic.

Yup

Originally Posted by Someone

I am a bad Troll who is too incompenent to even be respected as a troll.

There that's about right.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Seconded.

thirded

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Thank you for this.

Sorry.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

"I'm too good to defend myself in the pit where people might be mean to me"

Here, allow my Avvie to point. The smiley isn't big enough for pointing at a gaping asshole bigger that Goatse's.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

There that's about right.

It is a pathetic waste of skin, and should fuck off.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Thank you for this.

Yeah, I mean, I know you guys were just kidding and all, but let's not become like the Dope in that area.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Yeah, I mean, I know you guys were just kidding and all, but let's not become like the Dope in that area.

Yeah, it was too far. My apologies.

[Someone]

I guess I got caught up in the ME SO HORNY! thread.

In other snark news, I wonder if Idle Thoughts is doing vanity searches? His last Dope activity was today.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

It is a pathetic waste of skin, and should fuck off.

"It" is even worse than that. "It" pretends to be some sort of 'gender non-normative' person, and keeps trolling with that. "It" is not the appropriate 'pronoun' for it. The proper pronoun is one I came up with for gender-trolls like 'it'. We should refer to that troll as "S/He/It". That's pronounced "SHIT".

We'd still probably be giving the troll more credit than shit deserves.

ETA: I also propose that we skip my typography for the pronoun, and just write it as 'shit'. Example: Shit. Shit's back. Let's just ignore shit. Hey, @Fenris, could you just scrape this shit into the box, again?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

"It" is even worse than that. "It" pretends to be some sort of 'gender non-normative' person, and keeps trolling with that. "It" is not the appropriate 'pronoun' for it. The proper pronoun is one I came up with for gender-trolls like 'it'. We should refer to that troll as "S/He/It". That's pronounced "SHIT".

We'd still probably be giving the troll more credit than shit deserves.

ETA: I also propose that we skip my typography for the pronoun, and just write it as 'shit'. Example: Shit. Shit's back. Let's just ignore shit. Hey, @Fenris, could you just scrape this shit into the box, again?

Oh, NOW I get it...like a litter box, right? Is that why is smells of urine so much?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Oops, Ravid's gotten himself suspended.

I've always suspected that David is the sock of some previously-banned Doper. He's only been there for six months, has almost 3000 posts, and sounded like a typical derper from his first day.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I guess I got caught up in the ME SO HORNY! thread.

In other snark news, I wonder if Idle Thoughts is doing vanity searches? His last Dope activity was today.

What happened with Idle? I figured he would come back eventually.

Originally Posted by Someone

I've always suspected that David is the sock of some previously-banned Doper. He's only been there for six months, has almost 3000 posts, and sounded like a typical derper from his first day.

Maybe he's AmBar (wishful thinking.) Losing both Ducati and the Avocado were sad days for Snarkville. Sad days indeed.

[Someone]

Can't we just box it or ban it or whatever?

Originally Posted by Someone

Yeah, it was too far. My apologies.

It's cool, I know you were kidding around.

[Someone]

TMI fron Rivkachaya.
I'm sure her friends are glad she celebrates the death of Dorothy Parker in private.

Originally posted by Rivkachaya:

I have a tradition of going out with a few friends every Aug. 22 and knocking back a few in honor of Mrs. Parker. She might prefer we toast her on her death day of June 6 than on her birthday, but I always have my own private ceremony on June 6, because it happens to be also the anniversary of my first period. I remember only because it was the last day of school that year, so the date had been burned into my brain for months.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

AmBar

Maybe, maybe, moving to Colorado has been beneficial for him. Not spending time on an obsolete message board might mean he's doing something productive with his time*.

:checks his website:

Well, it looks the same. He's updated the contact info to his new location. I still don't know if he actually makes some money from it.




* Not doing something productive is my raison d'être.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

TMI fron Rivkachaya.
I'm sure her friends are glad she celebrates the death of Dorothy Parker in private.

Originally posted by Rivkachaya:

I don't see why that's TMI. Nothing shameful or unmentionable about the mere fact of a woman having periods. I don't remember the date of mine but I do remember it as a significant physical event. Bugger secrecy and shame!

[Someone]

It's not shameful or unmentionable, but I have to say I find it a wee bit peculiar to have a yearly ceremony commemorating the event. Granted, my opinions are no doubt colored by 25 years of hell courtesy of my female anatomy and the doctors who refused to listen to me...

[Someone]

What kind of drinks, I wonder?

Spoilered for being rude, possibly demeaning, and actually a bit gross:

Bloody Marys!

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

from Rivkachaya.

but I always have my own private ceremony on June 6, because it happens to be also the anniversary of my first period

Celebrating the onset of puberty by immortalizing the date your uterus went active? Whatever. Yeah, TMI.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Celebrating the onset of puberty by immortalizing the date your uterus went active? Whatever. Yeah, TMI.

I don't know that it was meant to be a "celebration."

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

TMI fron Rivkachaya.
I'm sure her friends are glad she celebrates the death of Dorothy Parker in private.

Originally posted by Rivkachaya:

Men seldom take taxis with girls who wear maxis.

[Someone]

I stand corrected. Apparently, a Happy Period Card is all the thing.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I stand corrected. Apparently, a Happy Period Card is all the thing.

Remember in the old Warner Bros. cartoons when a character would say, "Well, now I've seen everything" and blow their brains out with a revolver?

[Someone]

Looks like mrka's found a hobby: genealogy.

I've done some genealogical research. I found out about my Jewish roots, as one rabbi called it, with the help of the museum of history of the Polish Jews POLIN in Warsaw, Poland. I'd like to thank them here.
My roots which are in my father's lineage are important to me.
(snip)
Such percentages, I think, give me more feelings of disarray.
How can this be? Why am I not fulfilled?
An ex girlfriend of mine once drew me naked as a tree.
(snip)
Am I a freak?

I can't tell if it's nuttery or Beat poetry.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Remember in the old Warner Bros. cartoons when a character would say, "Well, now I've seen everything" and blow their brains out with a revolver?

There are, supposedly, cultures where the onset of menarche is celebrated, and similarly the conclusion of menopause. There is definitely an effort to remove the stigma of menstruation.

That said, WTF Cardmakers?

Originally Posted by Someone

Looks like mrka's found a hobby: genealogy.

I can't tell if it's nuttery or Beat poetry.

Embrace the power of And.

[Someone]

How could a DNA test come back "30% Jewish."

I'm thinking dumb as a pothole.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Embrace the power of And. WCIBB?

FTFY.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

How could a DNA test come back "30% Jewish."

I'm thinking dumb as a pothole.

If you'd read his other threads, you'd be thinking "nutty as a jar of cashews".

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

There are, supposedly, cultures where the onset of menarche is celebrated, and similarly the conclusion of menopause. There is definitely an effort to remove the stigma of menstruation.

Cups are messy;
Plugs impede;
Pads aren't dressy;
You might as well bleed.

(Okay, I'll stop now.)

[Someone]

I laughed.

[Someone]

begbert2, whom I remember best from the "tax-funded fuckdolls for incels" thread, manages to bring the into a thread about flowers:

I'm not aesthetically pleased by flowers - or sunsets or majestic mountains either, for that matter. Absolutely nothing in nature appeals to me, and precious little art does. Honestly, the only things I think look inherently appealing are women.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I laughed.

Same here.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Cups are messy;
Plugs impede;
Pads aren't dressy;
You might as well bleed.

(Okay, I'll stop now.)

❤

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Cups are messy;
Plugs impede;
Pads aren't dressy;
You might as well bleed.

(Okay, I'll stop now.)

Damn!

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Cups are messy;
Plugs impede;
Pads aren't dressy;
You might as well bleed.

(Okay, I'll stop now.)

Originally Posted by Someone

I laughed.

I hurt something trying NOT to laugh, because NO WAY was I explaining THAT to my co-workers.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

❤

FTFY

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Looks like mrka's found a hobby: genealogy.

I can't tell if it's nuttery or Beat poetry.

The snips are a good sound effect considering the Jewishness. I'll give it a six.

[Someone]

That dude is ill. And an asshole. He's a crazy asshole, and not in a good way.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

That dude is ill. And an asshole. He's a crazy asshole, and not in a good way.

Well, with so many crazy assholes at the dope, he sort of fits in.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Damn...

I'll be in my bunk...

Gross.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Maybe, maybe, moving to Colorado has been beneficial for him. Not spending time on an obsolete message board might mean he's doing something productive with his time*.

:checks his website:

Well, it looks the same. He's updated the contact info to his new location. I still don't know if he actually makes some money from it.

I checked his Facebook page recently. He doesn't post much—maybe once or twice a week. His posts are generally innocuous ... movies, TV shows, funny things he's seen around town, pictures of his dog, etc. He has a few friends who loyally respond to his observations.

He never mentions the graphic design business, so I have to wonder if that's going well. Maybe he's getting alimony from his ex-wife; I always had the impression that she was the primary breadwinner. He seemed to have a lot of time to dick around with side-hustles like "Renegade Consumer" and his cord-cutting classes.

[Someone]

I dropped in on the pet peeves thread today. Still very derpy and cringe-inducing.

Tony Sinclair and Mostly Clueless are angry at people who don't put mudflaps on their cars—which I guess means everybody. When was the last time you saw mudflaps on a car?

Annie-Xmas doesn't like it when someone takes too long to fish their credit card out of their wallet at the store. I wonder how she'd react if she was behind someone writing a check.

nightshadea is infuriated that his young cousin orders ham sandwiches in restaurants, because he could make it better and cheaper at home. (He doesn't actually specify her age, but he says "over the age of 9," so I'm guessing 10.) If I treated someone to lunch and all they ordered was a sandwich, I'd be thrilled.

russian heel, the separated-at-birth twin of pkbites, spends a lot of time in bars and is ENRAGED by most of what happens in bars. TV on the wrong channel? HULK SMASH!!!