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#1
7th December 2010, 10:29 AM
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Post your letter to Santa.
Dear Santa,
I haven't been particularly good this year. I completely tossed my diet, and the other day I cussed out a dude in line at the pharmacy. (In fairness, he completely deserved it. No, really!) However, I have worked lots of back-breaking overtime this year and managed to start a real savings account. I also worked very hard in school and made a B in a college level algebra class, which is like a miracle. A few things I would appreciate having this Christmas are: a bicycle a new coat and a scarf a new calendar for 2011 a bag of Dove chocolates some dog booties for Noodles and Ghost for walking this winter a happy new home for Antigone the cat I hope your trip goes smoothly and none of the reindeer crap in your sleigh. Best wishes, Radical Edward 
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#2
7th December 2010, 10:45 AM
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Dear Santa,
There was one thing I really wanted this year. ONE. And it doesn't cost a thing up front. And I'm not getting it. Screw you, Solfy. Nah, too bitter. Dear Santa, I've been marginally good this year, unless you count the amount of time I spent at the Raffe when I could have been more productive. This year I would like a bike - that blue Schwinn 7 speed cruiser they had at Target. 'kthnxbye. Better. . . but unrealistic. Dear Santa, I've told my daughters sixteen times that you don't bring adults anything, just kids. They've made "lists" for you consisting of every pink thing in every Toys R Us flier that has crossed our threshold for the past three months, glued to what's left of my printer paper with gobs and gobs of glue. The glue might even be dry by now. If it is, I'll enclose them in this letter. Please be advised that you are not to bring the girls Moon Sand, a trampoline, or anything I have to feed. I also recognize that a $5000 outdoor playset is unlikely to fit in either your budget or your sleigh. Please feel free to select from the remaining items and bring what you feel is a reasonable amount keeping in mind our desire to simultanously blow their consumeristic little minds while teaching them that Christmas isn't just about material gain. If you've already assembled the items, there will be extra cookies left out for you on the 24th. Love, Solfy
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#3
7th December 2010, 10:48 AM
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Dear Santa,
I'd like a new camera. A little thingy that I can carry around in my purse. Preferably a pink one. And if I don't get one, then fuck you because you don't exist anyway. Love, MS
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#4
7th December 2010, 10:50 AM
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Dear Santa.
Please read this very carefully. This is very important. It could influence the outcome of several Christmases to come. MY ONLY WISH is that you somehow, someway, prevent my State governor from running for President of the United States. I realize I am asking for this a couple of years early, but I also realize it may be a daunting request, and I wanted to get my foot in the door. This will give you time to set up a coup or something. Sincerely, Backyard
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#5
7th December 2010, 11:15 AM
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Dear Santa:
I have been VERY good this year. I lost some weight and totally started making actual improvements to my life and also I've been very kind to homeless people (especially if you count giving them cigarettes while waiting for traffic lights to turn green.) I want: A GOOD radio and a CD player or something that will let me play my MP3 player via my speakers for my truck A bike (nothing fancy, a beach cruiser type bike would be cool) A nice camera That's it, that's all I want. Help me out, bro. Love, Emily Last edited by Knee; 7th December 2010 at 11:27 AM.
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#6
7th December 2010, 11:57 AM
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Dear Santa,
Get cracking on that World Peace thing. If that's too much for your fat ass, maybe you could just fix the environment. Thank you, FoN
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#7
7th December 2010, 12:18 PM
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Dear St. Nick,
How's it goin? Hope your year went by quickly and you are just about ready for your big trip. I also hope the Missus doesn't miss you too bad while you're gone. I've been well. I've been trying to come up with a few gift ideas for this year and I got nothin. Please, don't think that my life is all sunshine and roses and shit, trust me, it's not. So, if it's not too much trouble, this year you could transfer my Christmas wish to my oldest son Wyatt and get him the money he needs for his trip to Europe this summer. He has been working so very hard to raise the money, it will break my heart if he doesn't pull it off. Thank, dude. I owe you one. ItsInTheCards
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#8
7th December 2010, 03:49 PM
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Dear Santa,
As you know, I told my mom that I wasn't interested in exchanging presents this year since I will be taking a family of four 2000 miles to see you and will be staying in a hotel and spending a lot of money. However, her hardheadedness has come through again, and she sent me a Christmas list along with a letter that tried very hard to pull at my guiltstrings. So please, Santa, bring her the fucking ELECTRONIC TRASH CAN that she just can't live without. Hate, Welby
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#9
7th December 2010, 03:59 PM
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Dear Santa,
I've been about as good as usual and expect about the same. A plane ticket or two would be great. Thanks, Dragonlady
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#10
7th December 2010, 04:37 PM
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Dear Kris Kringle,
Well, it's been a few years. I haven't been spectacularly good this year, but I haven't been horrid either. Let's call it a wash. I am trying to think of a list of things I need from you, but am coming up blank. How about peace in the new year? Oh, peace in the Middle-East is ludicrous to contemplate, but I'll settle for peace in the Chez Rigby. Help my kids accept our decision to separate, for their own peace of mind, sure, but mostly because I can't afford therapy for all three at once. Other than that, I've been jonesing for a bread maker for a while now. See what you can do. TTFN. Rigs
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#13
7th December 2010, 04:54 PM
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Dear Santa,
The one thing I want most in the world is something even you can't give me, so I won't even ask, and perhaps someday I'll even stop wishing for it. But I would be most pleased if I could have a warm and peaceful Christmas with a delicious mug of hot chocolate to sip. And I'd like the sun to be shining. Sincerely, Falcon
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#14
7th December 2010, 05:30 PM
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Dear Santa,
Since you have ignored the last 5 letters I've sent you, I've taken matters into my own hands. If you ever want to see Mrs. Claus again, deliver $5,000,000 in non-sequential $50's and $20's to my house by 12:01 a.m. December 25th. Merry Christmas!
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#15
7th December 2010, 05:32 PM
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Dear Santa,
Last year, I wanted the same thing that Solfy wanted this year. Now I know that's a bit out of your capabilities, so this year I am just asking for either me or Supes to get a full-time job ASAP. That's not too much to ask, right? Sans progeny and unemployed, mle
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#16
7th December 2010, 05:38 PM
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Quote:
Quote:
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#17
7th December 2010, 06:06 PM
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Quote:
PS: I'd really like the CD of Sting's "If On a Winter's Night". Ta.
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#18
7th December 2010, 06:20 PM
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Dear SANTa,
giVe mE a bunchA mONeY or the reindeer GET it. yours truly, ZEEneR
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#20
7th December 2010, 06:23 PM
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Quote:
Piracy? WHAT?
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#21
7th December 2010, 06:48 PM
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Dear Santa.
You probably think I deserve coal in my stocking. I can explain. I love my parents to death, I just can't live with them. I will feed them, and hubby and I will repair their home for them, so they can afford the extended stay hotel they now have to stay in, instead of my basement. All I want is for them to have a decent living situation, Hit girl to have a decent Yule, and for her to have enough warm clothing. If I can have that, I shall live with coal in my stocking. Grey
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#22
8th December 2010, 10:52 AM
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Dear Santa,
It was 33 degrees out when I got up today at 11 o'clock, so I went ahead and bought myself a scarf. I also ordered a new calendar with Giraffes on it, so you can mark those off my list. Sorry I'm a bit impatient, but you can still get me the bike and the dog booties and a new home for Antigone. Edward
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