Snark FM 105: the Durp

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

The avatar hate is beginning.

As you knew it would.

Why don't people who don't like avatars just turn them off?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Dumbth

Not mutually exclusive.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

As you knew it would.

Why don't people who don't like avatars just turn them off?

Because it's unacceptable that someone might be having fun nearby.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

The avatar hate is beginning.

More surprising there is not more.

A year from now it will be a non-issue except for the DrDumb types,

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

From this thread:

I learned something watching TV several decades ago:

"If your SO says 'We're gonna be on Jerry Springer!' you do not ask why. You don't want to know. You do not want to actually go on the show. Just recognize that the relationship is over, no matter how you may feel about it, and pack your bags and go. Wish your SO fun on his/her TV appearance, as you walk out, but DON'T go on the show. And don't ask why you/him/her were chosen to appear. You DO NOT want to know why they chose him/her for the show."

It was a dumb thread from the start. The replies could be nothing but distilled stupidity.

[Someone]

Testing new avatar...

EDIT: Success!

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

The avatar hate is beginning.

I don't know why this one made me laugh so much.

They suck. I turned them off immediately. Not that anyone cares about the lurkers.

I'd say who posted but who the fuck does care about the lurkers. Right?

[Someone]

Nobody's ever satisfied over there. I'm guessing if looked like an old IRC format, some of them would be absolutely thrilled.

[Someone]

thanks again for the assist Guin

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Why don't people who don't like avatars just turn them off?

They took pride in belonging to a community that scorned things like avatars. That's over, and they suddenly feel like an oppressed, ignored minority.

Originally Posted by Someone

Nobody's ever satisfied over there. I'm guessing if looked like an old IRC format, some of them would be absolutely thrilled.

I was thinking the same thing today. Seriously, they should provide a skin that makes the Dope look like Usenet viewed on an old monochrome monitor—sort of like the Gmail "Terminal" theme. They'd love that.

I also noticed that a couple of derpers are floating the idea of allowing banned members to buy their way back in. What could possibly go wrong with that?

[Someone]

TroutMan: "I think avatars suck, so I'm going to turn them off. But not before I subject you to mine."

Originally Posted by Someone

I find them annoying and distracting. But it was easy enough for me to turn them off, so I can't complain.

https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb...4&postcount=11

Originally Posted by Someone

Given all the comments from people who like them, I decided to add mine.

But I'm still turning them off in my own view.

https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb...9&postcount=52

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I also noticed that a couple of derpers are floating the idea of allowing banned members to buy their way back in. What could possibly go wrong with that?

Either they reform or they get banned again. Win-win.
Make it clear they're on a very short leash.

[Someone]

And they're also worrying about copyright. WTF?

Is this like your first day on the internet?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Nobody's ever satisfied over there. I'm guessing if looked like an old IRC format, some of them would be absolutely thrilled.

That's not fair to say nobody. But there's definitely a loud contingent that will never be happy with any change.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I was thinking the same thing today. Seriously, they should provide a skin that makes the Dope look like Usenet viewed on an old monochrome monitor—sort of like the Gmail "Terminal" theme. They'd love that.

I actually would like that...for a bit. As long as there is the choice between green and amber.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

The avatar hate is beginning.

This whole thing is just riddled with so much "what the ever-loving fuck" it's gone beyond stupid and smack dab into incomprehensible. Turn the fuckers off if you don't like them!

I've been there since 99 - I can't believe so many of them must still be eating paste!

[Someone]

Somebody needs to give every one of the luddite anti-avatar whiners a default avatar of a short bus window licker. They'll never know it's there and the rest of us can enjoy the tummy warming schadenfreude every time we see one. *sigh* I can dream, right?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

This whole thing is just riddled with so much "what the ever-loving fuck" it's gone beyond stupid and smack dab into incomprehensible. Turn the fuckers off if you don't like them!

I'm not really feeling the ever-loving fuck. Most in that thread seem to like them, a few are mostly indifferent( me, at least ). A handful don't like them, but almost everyone of those has said they've turned them off. Overall I've seen only a very few people complain they exist at all - I agree those people need to get a grip.

So what's the big deal? A handful of naysayers. You'll get that if you ask people if they like chocolate. Including on this board. I don't really get the "what-a-bunch-of-retards" vibe on this one.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

And they're also worrying about copyright. WTF?

Is this like your first day on the internet?

they told me I was gonna be in copyright trouble for posting copypasta

[Someone]

The dopers are getting scared of a shutdown and what to know how to survive the sinking of the Titanic.

https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb...1#post21138685

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I'm not really feeling the ever-loving fuck. Most in that thread seem to like them, a few are mostly indifferent( me, at least ). A handful don't like them, but almost everyone of those has said they've turned them off. Overall I've seen only a very few people complain they exist at all - I agree those people need to get a grip.

So what's the big deal? A handful of naysayers. You'll get that if you ask people if they like chocolate. Including on this board. I don't really get the "what-a-bunch-of-retards" vibe on this one.

I think it's just the WTF factor. I mean, even if you say, "turn them off", you get idiots like Ritter Sports who whines that he views the board while logged out, so he still has to look at them. Or the fact that people are complaining at all even though you can turn them off, even though you still have the "nice clean look" you so desire.

For a board that's all about "fighting ignorance", the stupidity just astounds me.

[Someone]

name TV characters who are good cooks but who do not do it for a job

https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb...60&postcount=9

SpongeBob is an employed crabby patty cook.



idk it's not even worth getting mad about but people just don't read the topic concept?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

They took pride in belonging to a community that scorned things like avatars. That's over, and they suddenly feel like an oppressed, ignored minority.

Yes, a certain loud mouthed minority over the years, like shut-ins in a retirement home and now suddenly the shuttered windows have been opened up, a breath of fresh(ish) air blows in, and they are sure they're catching their death.

Meanwhile others are more like Theoden getting woken up by Gandalf... (heheh, LOTR movie ref.).

Originally Posted by Someone

That's not fair to say nobody. But there's definitely a loud contingent that will never be happy with any change.

Yes, although as we're seeing with the wave of changes from Tuba - who really needs to keep getting credit here - the loud contingent is less a majority than it seemed in the shouting down of change in ATMB over the years (of course it was the contingent that bothered to respond in ATMB, so like real voting, if you show up, you rule).

My whole mental vision of the place now is a mouldy shut-ins lodge shuttered up from the dangers of the impure Ignorant Mundane world, and the warnings over the years by the Grima types about letting in dangerous impure deviant practices getting swept away by the opening of the windows...

I was thinking the same thing today. Seriously, they should provide a skin that makes the Dope look like Usenet viewed on an old monochrome monitor—sort of like the Gmail "Terminal" theme. They'd love that.

Why not?

A few different skins for different flavors, drop the One Right Way pretensions.

Is it possible to have Skins for members only setting? (that's an honest question really, I presume given the forum here it may be given logged-in/non-logg-in).

I also noticed that a couple of derpers are floating the idea of allowing banned members to buy their way back in. What could possibly go wrong with that?

Originally Posted by Someone

Either they reform or they get banned again. Win-win.
Make it clear they're on a very short leash.

Like Papal Tuba Indulgences, why not?
If a Dio wanted to buy back in (membership plus buy-out his warnings), but on short leash it would be cash plus also dumping the pretensious taking-themselves-too-seriously approach that developed over the years (which tracks the decline of the column from snarky and light and popular, to aging out Ed decline). Like dumping the Holy Rule Book.

Stating it as Indulegences is of course having a bit of fun, but it's really not an ipso facto terrible idea - could be worth an experiment with limits (obviously some levels of nastiness would be unwise to let back in, e.g. the pedo).

And if it doesn't work, shut it down.

Originally Posted by Someone

I actually would like that...for a bit. As long as there is the choice between green and amber.

Then maybe Wendel would feel at home.

Originally Posted by Someone

I'm not really feeling the ever-loving fuck. Most in that thread seem to like them, a few are mostly indifferent( me, at least ). A handful don't like them, but almost everyone of those has said they've turned them off. Overall I've seen only a very few people complain they exist at all - I agree those people need to get a grip.

So what's the big deal? A handful of naysayers. You'll get that if you ask people if they like chocolate. Including on this board. I don't really get the "what-a-bunch-of-retards" vibe on this one.

I agree - here we're seeing the Neg Vibe that gives a bit of support to thin-skinned ECG's view of this place.

The complaints on Avatars are in fact really limited so far and absolutely right, no matter the change, in any circumstance there's going to be 20% of the population that has vapors over it.

The actual response is showing rather the nay sayers (there and here) have been wrong over the years.

Originally Posted by Someone

The dopers are getting scared of a shutdown and what to know how to survive the sinking of the Titanic.

https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb...1#post21138685

Grrr.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I think it's just the WTF factor. I mean, even if you say, "turn them off", you get idiots like Ritter Sports who whines that he views the board while logged out, so he still has to look at them. Or the fact that people are complaining at all even though you can turn them off, even though you still have the "nice clean look" you so desire.

For a board that's all about "fighting ignorance", the stupidity just astounds me.

a handful of people.
You're now trying to take the slogan that we all know is a silly pretense far too seriously just to enable complaining.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I also noticed that a couple of derpers are floating the idea of allowing banned members to buy their way back in. What could possibly go wrong with that?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

My whole mental vision of the place now is a mouldy shut-ins lodge shuttered up from the dangers of the impure Ignorant Mundane world, and the warnings over the years by the Grima types about letting in dangerous impure deviant practices getting swept away by the opening of the windows...

Great mental image there.

[Someone]

Ed is Saruman.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I think it's just the WTF factor. I mean, even if you say, "turn them off", you get idiots like Ritter Sports who whines that he views the board while logged out, so he still has to look at them. Or the fact that people are complaining at all even though you can turn them off, even though you still have the "nice clean look" you so desire.

For a board that's all about "fighting ignorance", the stupidity just astounds me.

A long time ago in one of the avatar threads on the Dope (no cite, and I am not going to bother looking) someone was very concerned that if one user had avatars enabled and another had avatars diasbled, then their user experiences on the Dope would, in fact, be different and that was a very bad thing(tm).

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

a handful of people.
You're now trying to take the slogan that we all know is a silly pretense far too seriously just to enable complaining.

Here, I've noticed over several of your posts that you have run out of commas.

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[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

A long time ago in one of the avatar threads on the Dope (no cite, and I am not going to bother looking) someone was very concerned that if one user had avatars enabled and another had avatars diasbled, then their user experiences on the Dope would, in fact, be different and that was a very bad thing(tm).

That's why, in random durp threads, everyone should post things like 'hey, so-and-so, cool avatar.' Drive the never, never crowd crazy.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Like Papal Tuba Indulgences, why not?

More like PayPal Indulgences.

[Someone]

Maybe we should all use a giraffe for an avatar over there. ECG would have another stick-up-his-ass event. Then we'd have that to snark. Proactive avataring FTW.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

More like PayPal Indulgences.

That's soooo last thread.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

That's soooo last thread.

Lol, I know. I thought instead of complimenting you on your wordplay, I would steal it and act all smug about it.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Maybe we should all use a giraffe for an avatar over there. ECG would have another stick-up-his-ass event. Then we'd have that to snark. Proactive avataring FTW.

I used my avatar from here over there. Because, as people keep reminding them, we're the same posters here and there.

[Someone]

Some of the suggestions to bring in new blood and engagement are so quaint and out of touch as to be make me laugh. Email newsletter, now there's a cutting edge way to drive Board engagement for new blood.
Hand out some free branded 3.5"s and maybe a lottery for a Walkman to go along!

On the other hand the post liking for engagement stickiness and encouraging interesting engagement is a genuinely good idea.

[Someone]

Shags is running a charity for rich girls. Here

Originally Posted by Someone

I think most relationships are asymmetrical. I have a girlfriend (an Episcopal Priest no less) that I adore but she comes from a dysfunctional family and loves to throw in random insults to me that are out of place during conversations. I asked her very politely to stop doing that and that released a shitstorm of emotions that I still haven't gotten worked through with her.

I pay for everything including trips to Savannah and Vermont in just the past couple of months and I have two daughters that need equal support. I sometimes feel like I am running a charity for rich girls. I make decent money and have a good job but it is mainly just for pass-through payments to the women in my life.

[Someone]

Well, he's not gonna get any poontang for free, is he?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

... in random durp threads, everyone should post things like 'hey, so-and-so, cool avatar.' Drive the never, never crowd crazy.

That is a great idea.

Originally Posted by Someone

... as people keep reminding them, we're the same posters here and there.

Some of us are not.

[Someone]

This "NYT racist writer" thread is pretty Derpy, which I can attest to having interacted with both sides fruitlessly.

[Someone]

A newbie bumps a zombie about the song Money For Nothing and goes us his practically incomprehensible interpretation.

Originally Posted by Someone

What does money bring us beyond the obvious of being able to buy food, shelter and ‘basics’?And even for that it “ain’t working”. It just brings us uniformity of colour TVs and free chicks of nature of buy one get one free. We’ve got to move away from the rat race of consumerdom. . . A version of the song , incidentally, that I just listened to, unless I heard wrong , substituted the refrain I want one for “how long now? “ ..The song also says: ‘well, ofcourse you could escape from this stupid being a cog in a machine working by becoming the millionaire propelling it, but even here, you’re gonna find yourself in another straight jacket of being envied rather than envying. Concluding then, the song says the capitalist system or the state capitalist system if you’re in China, “ain’t working”, is bringing us nothing worth having except envy and endless wars.

https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb...0&postcount=52

[Someone]

Someone needs a med adjustment.

[Someone]

From this post :

Originally Posted by Someone

Thanks a lot.I am taking my medication. <snipped the cray away>

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Shags is running a charity for rich girls. Here

Every relationship he's ever had (including as a parent of two girls, allegedly), he's been the one 'forced' to pay for everything and provide everything. Even the Episcopalian priest is just a money-grubbing harpy. If that was the story of my life (I could only attract women who want to use me for my money), I would be embarrassed to tell that, yet he revels in it. I also wonder at the faith/sincerity of any religious figure who would willingly associate with Shags in a romantic fashion.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

A long time ago in one of the avatar threads on the Dope (no cite, and I am not going to bother looking) someone was very concerned that if one user had avatars enabled and another had avatars diasbled, then their user experiences on the Dope would, in fact, be different and that was a very bad thing(tm).

That was czarcasm. I can’t find the thread, but it was during the last big avatar fight, the time he warned a bunch of people for talking in IMHO

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

That was czarcasm. I can’t find the thread, but it was during the last big avatar fight, the time he warned a bunch of people for talking in IMHO

Is this it?

Then there was bucketybuck's other thread about it.

And speaking of Czarcasm, here's his passive-agressive attempt to try and get people to say how much they hate atheists. (Much like Liberal and his "handstabbers!" bullshit)

[Someone]

Huey Trollman... err... Freeman serves up some fine trolling. Here's his White-People-Rating scale!

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

(Much like Liberal and his "handstabbers!" bullshit)

Linky, please?

[Someone]

I think I could google that, but I'd also like a link to the source of his "intelligent squid" libertarian hypothetical which I've heard lots of times as a source of butthurt on the part of several parties but could never find the dope origins of.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Some of the suggestions to bring in new blood and engagement are so quaint and out of touch as to be make me laugh. Email newsletter, now there's a cutting edge way to drive Board engagement for new blood.

It's not that daft an idea - email newsletters having been having a resurgence over the last two-three years, and they're only getting more popular. The NY Time Daily, The Skimm (which gets bagged a lot because of its tone, but it's still hugely popular), Quartz's Daily Brief - these and other newsletters are actually booming at the moment. I work for an Australian news/media organisation and we have the same experience - they're very popular.

• Everyone has email, and email is inherently mobile
• Spam filters are pretty damn good at the moment, so most people's email accounts are relatively uncluttered by spam
• There's an appetite for the right information - by which I mean info that matches what the reader wants, is simply delivered and has additional information available via links. As long as the newsletter has a focus and keeps to it, you have happy readers e.g. if you advertise the list as being for political wonks, don't bother with sports content; if you advertise the list as being about football, don't bother with basketball.
• They're actually pretty economical for publishers to put together - you're already making the content if you're a media publisher (e.g. NYT, Quartz) or you've got tons of sources to filter from if you're not, and you just link to several to bring readers a broad perspective.

I don't know if the Dope would be able to do a daily one long-term, but the overall idea ain't that daft given the way newsletters are going at the moment.