Durp 9 from Outer Snark

[Someone]

Wait wait wait. YogSosoth is the one who's 32, and too busy playing video games and being a loser? What's his defect?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Wait wait wait. YogSosoth is the one who's 32, and too busy playing video games and being a loser? What's his defect?

Boy ain't right in the head.

[Someone]

Notice BigT also weighed in on those poor, poor abused people of Hoarders, and how it's so not fair to expect them to get better.

Oh god, I wouldn't trust YogSosoth with sea monkeys at this point. Maybe someone should tell him that Christians like dogs or something like that. (He thought you could just drop a dog off at obedience school?)

I don't even like my dog all that much, and I wouldn't drop her out in the rain. (She's not my dog -- she's my dad's.)


Okay, reading this thread makes me want to cry. Poor, poor puppy. Please, please don't let him get a dog.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Boy ain't right in the head.

Understatement of the year!

Of course, in the linked thread, Lynn just has to be a bitch. ladyfoxfyre was right, you don't have to post whatever creepy thoughts you have all over the SDMB. Pointing that out isn't threadshitting, it's fucking common sense. Yeesh.

[Someone]

For God's sake, that place just become loonier by the moment!

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

For God's sake, that place just become scarier by the moment!

FTFY

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Some shit making me mad on the Dope:
2. YogSosoth the dog dumbass. Thread sum up:

Look, fucker, dogs aren't toys. Your sister is an idiot, and so are you for going along with this plan. I could list the millions of reasons why this is a bad idea; reasons that you would know if you had an ounce of sense, but you are clearly beyond hope. You are a piece of shit. Your sister is a bigger piece of shit. Your parents are shit. A family of shit, getting a poor dog to negelect. God damn, it makes me mad and sad.

Mad and sad, that's pretty much where I landed. How can he COMPLETELY lack empathy for a living, breathing animal? And his sister THE NURSE doesn't understand that a living thing needs daily care and attention? Ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh. So upsetting.

Once again, I'm glad I don't let my dogs read the Dope. This would probably damage them more than being hit on by tdn.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Fucking fascinating story.

Ants in your fridge are a commonplace occurrence?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I'm starting to come to the realization that I probably wouldn't like Even Sven IRL.

What do you mean, starting to?

I can't go over to the Dope to read the crazy. I can't find an ad blocker that works and I fear malware. So, I am confining my posts here to comments on posts here. Kinda meta, but it works.

[Someone]

The most amazing thing about YogSosoth's dog thread is that (so far) no one has asked why he and his 32-year-old sister (a nurse with a job) are still living at home, and apparently have no plans to leave. Ever.

I get that generations are piling on each other (in this economy it makes sense) but it still surprises me that nobody's said anything.

My desk at work fronts a big window overlooking a small trailer park. The people in the nearest trailer have a yellow Lab, chained to his doghouse, and I have yet to see anyone give him a second of attention. The kid comes home from school, mom and dad come home from work, the dog hears them, runs to the end of his chain, tail wagging, big old goofy grin on his face. Nothing. Breaks my heart.

Some towns are passing ordinances against dogs being chained in yards all the time. We could do that here, but I suspect the dog would just end up in a shelter.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Wait wait wait. YogSosoth is the one who's 32, and too busy playing video games and being a loser? What's his defect?

I just filed Yog Sothot under the "retard that does crosswords while waiting at traffic lights (and probably accelerates without checking if there are any pedestrians)". Didnt know he was cross-referenced in several retard categories.


ETA: so, a guy that was looking for dog sex toys (and apparently sex toys that require human interaction), wants a dog, but doesnt particularly wish to "care" for it. I'm starting to wonder why he wants a dog in the first place.

I really do.

[Someone]

Tell him that dogs believe in God. Oh wait, I mentioned that already. Well I'll mention it again. It just might work.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Durp snark: We Have Much to Learn from Ten ?

Durp sven: We Have Much to Learn from Ten

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

You can tell the quality of her inactions. I mean she's too lazy to even make a proper website.

More than spiders will bite her for sure! hahaha :hairy:

That website crashes my browser. Maybe her spiders got into it and keep biting my machine?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

We could do that here, but I suspect the dog would just end up in a shelter.

Away from the people who don't want it, and hopefully coming to the attention of people who do want to have and take care of a dog. At the ery least he'll be in out of the elements.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

What do you mean, starting to?

I can't go over to the Dope to read the crazy. I can't find an ad blocker that works and I fear malware. So, I am confining my posts here to comments on posts here. Kinda meta, but it works.

I just switched to Firefox with Adblock, and it's lovely.

[Someone]

Did you see where he said he'll just get another dog to keep it company? Jesus Christ.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I just switched to Firefox with Adblock, and it's lovely.

Not to mention a HOSTS file blocking ads.
Add flash block to the mix and only flash content that you want to see will be shown, after you click the link. It's all quite peaceful.

[Someone]

A week or two ago I picked up some spyware somewhere (namely the Straight Dope Malware Board) so after that I went all out. I have flashblock and scriptblock too. It just kind of pisses me off that I have to almost sandbox my PC just to read a stupid message board

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Some shit making me mad on the Dope:

1. Stoid. There's a Hoarding thread discussing the show and the problems with hoarding. Interesting, whatever. Stoid shows up and starts with her usual victim bullshit, she has spiders all over and she's too lazy sick to deal with it. She's also enjoying a little bit of PALATHoarder, though. Then, starting on Post 181 Ellen Cherry mentions how maddening it is to watch these people whine and make bad decisions and excuses, rather than try to fix the problem.

Ahhh, Stoid.

I posted in her "tell me about being neat and organized" thread where I and the other lost souls who posted shared our tips for being neat and organized because we were dumb enough to think she was actually looking for tips on organizing stuff.

Then she came back in and was all like "well I can't do that" and "because of my ADHD I can't think like that" and "that won't work" and "I wasn't actually looking for suggestions on how to organize stuff."

Yeah, OK, Madam ADHD, you go right on living up to your ass in GILF porn and poisonous spiders.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

A week or two ago I picked up some spyware somewhere (namely the Straight Dope Malware Board) so after that I went all out. I have flashblock and scriptblock too. It just kind of pisses me off that I have to almost sandbox my PC just to read a stupid message board

Got a major virus that came from the Dope, without any place for doubt, last week. It fucking tires my ass that a message board that's so fucking gluttonous in memory while having nothing to show for it (paleolithic search engine, no graphic quality to speak of, super long load times) would, in addition, hosts so many viruses. And be surprised when people bitch about it.
It's the only board that I know of that functions like that.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Got a major virus that came from the Dope, without any place for doubt, last week. It fucking tires my ass that a message board that's so fucking gluttonous in memory while having nothing to show for it (paleolithic search engine, no graphic quality to speak of, super long load times) would, in addition, hosts so many viruses. And be surprised when people bitch about it.
It's the only board that I know of that functions like that.

"The Straight Dope Message Board: Our ad revenue is more important to us than our members."

[Someone]

Stoid's "ADD" bullshit is really maddening. I have ADD. Quit using it as an excuse to live in filth, bitch.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Did you see where he said he'll just get another dog to keep it company? Jesus Christ.

I've been trying to do my part, but it's infuriating. His little jokes are obnoxious. Whole thing makes me sad.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Look, fucker, dogs aren't toys. Your sister is an idiot, and so are you for going along with this plan. I could list the millions of reasons why this is a bad idea; reasons that you would know if you had an ounce of sense, but you are clearly beyond hope. You are a piece of shit. Your sister is a bigger piece of shit. Your parents are shit. A family of shit, getting a poor dog to negelect. God damn, it makes me mad and sad.

That thread is infuriating. The sister sounds like a selfish idiot: "I go out all the time now so I'm getting a dog to entice me to stay home more!" Oh yeah, that will definitely work. No way will you fall back into your normal pattern once the shiny has worn off the new dog and it's just a boring animal that requires work to keep healthy and happy.

I would be delighted if someone kicked her in the stomach. Yes, I know that's awful, but I don't care.

[Someone]

I was going to type a reply but in the end decided not to bother. Then I decided to put one here.

I'm sort of in Yog's position with our goat. My husband went behind my back & got a goat. That was 17 years ago & she's still with us. He's lost interest in looking after her & now has an arm injury where he can't clip her hooves. He is really annoyed that I'm paying the vet to do it, but I can't stand watching her suffer.

& don't get me started on when he took on a dog.

You always have to find out an animal's life expectancy before you take one on & think about how old you are going to be & where you are going to be in your life.

& Yog thinking you can take an animal to a shelter. I can't imagine the States are any different than here. Unless the animal is a pedigree its rare for a shelter/SPCA to find a home for an adult dog/cat. & they aren't always successful with pedigrees either.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Durp sven: We Have Much to Learn from Ten

All Men Play On Sven

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I would be delighted if someone kicked her in the stomach. Yes, I know that's awful, but I don't care.

I just posted, well, a bunch of shit, but I ended with saying they should get the meanest dog out there, and hopefully it will eat her.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Did you see where he said he'll just get another dog to keep it company? Jesus Christ.

It takes a rare poster to make PapSett the voice of measured reason.

[Someone]

I know it's low-hanging fruit, but after being the relative voice of reason, PapSett goes back to being an utterly batshit dog-hoarder.

[Someone]

I thought she only had four? Yikes!

I will confess -- right now our dog looks like a mess, because she won't let anyone groom her (we tried taking her to the groomers -- she wouldn't let THEM do it either!). But as cranky as she is, she's still taken care of. She's well fed, sheltered, she's walked, she gets plenty of attention, she's got warm beds, a warm place to sleep, etc. I don't even like her all that much, and I wouldn't let her go near YogSosoth. (Well, except to let her bite him) The only time I've EVER hit her is when she tried to wrestle one of the cats and I had to get her off. And then I only smacked her rump.

She does sleep in her crate at night because she can't be trusted in any of the bedrooms. But we have it all fixed up with blankets and a little bed and drapes so it's like a nice little den. She used to go in there on her own until the cats started going in there, and we had to keep it locked up until it's bed time. (Dumb cats)

Yes, we have six cats. But cats, unlike dogs, aren't that big. They're all indoors only, they're all fed, kept warm, have warm beds, plenty of attention, and they have each other for company as well. We don't stick any of our animals outside all day while we're gone.


"Oh, if it doesn't work out, we'll just dump the dog off at the shelter!" Stupid fuck.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Stoid's "ADD" bullshit is really maddening. I have ADD. Quit using it as an excuse to live in filth, bitch.

This. I have it to, and guess how I'm spending the day? Yeah, deep-cleaning the house.

The last thing an ADDer wants in their life is an additional distraction from clutter.

I've got two dogs. If you're lucky, like I was, you'll end up with a pair that get along spectacularly, and keep each other company. In any case, you'll also end up with two dogs following you to the bathroom, two dogs sleeping in your bed, twice the food bills, twice the vet bills, twice the attention you have to give to keep them happy ...

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

I know it's low-hanging fruit, but after being the relative voice of reason, PapSett goes back to being an utterly batshit dog-hoarder.

Last I remember she had four, too. So now she has a fifth and she's going on about how she totally loves them. Yeah.

Anybody want to go into that thread and ask if she still beats them from time to time when she gets frustrated?

[Someone]

We already did that and it keeps making her go away forever. See how well it's working?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Last I remember she had four, too. So now she has a fifth and she's going on about how she totally loves them. Yeah.

Anybody want to go into that thread and ask if she still beats them from time to time when she gets frustrated?

I thought she got the female doberman she was talking about while she was here (aka "gone forever" from the durp), or was that one she was talking about and we all went "Dude, you can't cope with the dogs you've got. Seriously WTF?"

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Ahhh, Stoid.

I posted in her "tell me about being neat and organized" thread where I and the other lost souls who posted shared our tips for being neat and organized because we were dumb enough to think she was actually looking for tips on organizing stuff.

Then she came back in and was all like "well I can't do that" and "because of my ADHD I can't think like that" and "that won't work" and "I wasn't actually looking for suggestions on how to organize stuff."

Yeah, OK, Madam ADHD, you go right on living up to your ass in GILF porn and poisonous spiders.

Sounds like Opal.

[Someone]

Did she say she had clothes in the kitchen? :o And black widows, too. Jesus, get on the phone, call an exterminator. Those things are dangerous.

Mind you, I also have OCD -- which kind of freaks me out when you consider that hoarding is associated with it. Thank god I skipped that! In fact, reading those threads makes me go on cleaning sprees. (My only hoarding, if you can call it that, is that I tend to bookmark too many pages on the internet.)

[Someone]

Guin starts a pit thread, Cat Whisperer goes "3 page thread tl;dr, I'm not seeing outrage".

[Someone]

Oh ma gods, gonna be a good pit now here comes that goddamn curl coat

[Someone]

Jesus god, I just agreed with curlcoat. I swear that her post was not there when I typed mine. Unbelievable.

[Someone]

"This message has been hidden because curlcoat is on your ignore list" are some of the most beautiful words in the English language.

As soon as trollcunt barges into a thread it's over. There's just something about there that people will keep responding to, even though they know they shouldn't. I know because I spent entirely too much time arguing with her in my Lynn Bodoni pitting before I wised up and just started talking football with another poster.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Stoid's "ADD" bullshit is really maddening. I have ADD. Quit using it as an excuse to live in filth, bitch.

So what's your excuse for being a barely functioning, shut-in retard with no life?

(mine is an unhealthy obsession to dingleberries)

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

So what's your excuse for being a barely functioning, shut-in retard with no life?

(mine is an unhealthy obsession to dingleberries)

I meet people like you.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

in my Lynn Bodoni pitting...

???

Link???

[Someone]

Yes, we have six cats. But cats, unlike dogs, aren't that big

Sorry, guin, but that's totally a crazy cat lady excuse.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Sorry, guin, but that's totally a crazy cat lady excuse.

Hey, it wasn't MY choice to have all those damned cats. Besides, considering there are four of us, that's a ratio of two cats to one person. Sort of.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

My flying monkeys shall protect me!

Your flying monkeys must be a better breed than mine. My flying monkeys won't stay flying for very long at a stretch. Maybe I should switch them to jet-engine wings on full body harnesses instead of using trebuchets.

ETA:

Originally Posted by Someone

A week or two ago I picked up some spyware somewhere (namely the Straight Dope Malware Board) so after that I went all out. I have flashblock and scriptblock too. It just kind of pisses me off that I have to almost sandbox my PC just to read a stupid message board

And that, URT, is the problem. SDMB has been moving well into the stupid range over the last few years.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Maybe I should switch them to jet-engine wings on full body harnesses instead of using trebuchets.

Well, aren't you a font of wisdom today.



Whut?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Jesus god, I just agreed with curlcoat. I swear that her post was not there when I typed mine. Unbelievable.

I expected quite the opposite reaction from her. She makes sense. Yog's dog won't have the best life possible, but whose dog does?

Our Sadie is spoiled rotten and much loved, but I'm pretty sure she doesn't like it much when we leave her alone for a few hours. Or when she wants to play but we're too tired. When she wants to go for a car ride but her feet are dirty. When she needs a bath. When she's denied food that will upset her tummy.

On a scale of 1 to 10, Sadie's life is probably an 8. Yog's dog's life could easily be a 5 or 6. Maybe even a 7, if he chooses the right dog. Fenced yard, dog house, a family that can afford good food and vet care, occasional play time and exercise. Better than a shelter.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Your flying monkeys must be a better breed than mine. My flying monkeys won't stay flying for very long at a stretch. Maybe I should switch them to jet-engine wings on full body harnesses instead of using trebuchets.

Piss off, Skald.