On a scale of 1-10, how durpy is this snark?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

he is/was perma-boxed.

You asked.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

You asked.

ISWYDT.

Fenris might be confusing a perma-boxing here with his banning at the SDMB.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Ah, the genteel decorum of the pre-1960s mindset!

So..I call out AC for being an asshole...and I'm wrong? Was my language too strong? Did it trigger you or something? Do you need a safe space and a teddy bear?

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Didn't we perma-box you?

I will add 1,000,000 posts (or whatever the maximum is if 1,000,000 is too many) if someone can find a post from an admin saying that he is/was perma-boxed.

Sorry to disappoint you, o furry one. But why would you be wondering that about me? I simply responded in an appropriate manner to AC's half-assed comment.

[Someone]

In all fairness Fenny, it was probably 5000 of those 5,000 clothy socks that got boxinated. They were more frequent than dog turds at a dog park.

You'd know these things if you paid any attention to us instead of A&C boxing people and then getting nice posters like that school marm from Long Island to do your dirty deeds.

[Someone]

Psst you can permabox him NOW.

I was going to defend Mr. Hump since I felt his first comment in the thread wasn't that off-kilter and the initial response was rather brusque and unnecessary. But when he immediately resumes his "you're TRIGGERED!" tropes (funny from one so easily roused) I realize how little he adds to these fora except by his absence.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Doth thou refer to country matters?

For I do indeed bite my thumb at thee, sirrah!

(Actually, it had something to do with anal polyps of a syphilitic warthog, I think.)

Originally Posted by Someone

So..I call out AC for being an asshole...and I'm wrong? Was my language too strong? Did it trigger you or something? Do you need a safe space and a teddy bear?

First of all, Humpy, you do realize that being triggered is not the same as being offended, right? Second of all, we're not in the pit. You want to get your mouth washed out with soap, come after another poster in this thread with that kind of language. You want to go after another poster with that kind of language? GO TO THE GD PIT.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

For I do indeed bite my thumb at thee, sirrah!

(Actually, it had something to do with anal polyps of a syphilitic warthog, I think.)

First of all, Humpy, you do realize that being triggered is not the same as being offended, right? Second of all, we're not in the pit. You want to get your mouth washed out with soap, come after another poster in this thread with that kind of language. You want to go after another poster with that kind of language? GO TO THE GD PIT.

Just out of curiosity, are you planning to tee off on AC for his unwarranted comment to me?

ETA: you were correct, Sis. I should have taken it to the pit. I have edited my original post to remove the offending terms. My apologies.

[Someone]

Edit: Fair enough. Apology accepted.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

... I realize how little he adds to these fora except by his absence.

If that's the new standard then I'm doomed. Clothy got kicked in the nuts, and he kicked back. Shit like that disrupts this fabulous forum and the forumites forumating herein. Then, we end up with furious forumites fuming and frothing instead of factual fnarking the furpers.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

^&^% you and the horse you rode in on, you ignorant %#$*# *#E&#^ scumbag.

Edited: it was pointed out to me that my original post contained language more suitable for the pit. I have now edited the post to remove the offending terms.

Oh look it's our low-class redneck failed dojo manager who can't afford to fix his windows back to shout and cuss and generally act like the dumb racist failure that he is.

Cool.

Originally Posted by Someone

So..I call out AC for being an asshole...and I'm wrong? Was my language too strong? Did it trigger you or something? Do you need a safe space and a teddy bear?

Trigger, hoo hoo.

Clothie the Easily Triggered Dimwit tries to play the I'm Rubber You're Glue gambit.

Very amusing.

It's so funny when Clothy postures like that shambling drunk at the end of the dive bar puffing out his chest and lecturing the clientelle on his smarts and good manners and his cussin' is just to show them libruls and wetbacks their place.

Originally Posted by Someone

Sorry to disappoint you, o furry one. But why would you be wondering that about me? I simply responded in an appropriate manner to AC's half-assed comment.

So Fenris, 1 month for talking back at the Fenris?

I tink that'd larn him summit.

(well not really, we all know he's too stupid to learn anything, but it'd be funny at least)

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

This from his tumblr "submit" page.

"If you wish to submit a post to me, feel free. If you would prefer to submit yourself to me, feel free to do that as well."

http://toymakers-workshop.tumblr.com/submit

Creep a deeky do.

Why.... why would anyone draw attention to that...

Ewww....

(and how do grainy, low to mediocre-at-best phone-camera shots become 'tasteful erotica'... never mind, no need to answer that).

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

He's not concerned with why he sucks in bed. He's concerned with the fact that he's never been in bed. Obviously, the reason no woman will touch him is because he doesn't have that magic foreskin. His problem is that he tried to find an answer, and if he found the MRA websites, that's what he would blame. Instead, he found the Anti-Circ fruitcakes to tell him why he can't get laid. No one will tell him the real reason: "Dude. It's your personality. No woman will actually want you, because you are an asshole. Assholes are generally rather unloved. Stop being an asshole and you might get laid.

My personal theory is that he's been in bed (with a person of the opposite sex, being all hetero) like... 2 times.

Both times ended badly.

Thus he moved to the Magic Foreskin explanation.

I believe this theory, hypothesis really, fits the observed facts.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

In all fairness Fenny, it was probably 5000 of those 5,000 clothy socks that got boxinated. They were more frequent than dog turds at a dog park.

You'd know these things if you paid any attention to us instead of A&C boxing people and then getting nice posters like that school marm from Long Island to do your dirty deeds.

The Clotha Bruthas are not Boxed.

We were watching the frontier against the Caravan coming to take away the good jobs from the White Man Good Americans.

[Someone]

Yes, damn libruls promoting the invasion of our good country, but we have come back from watching the frontier to support our ClothaBrutha against the oppression and the triggering by these damned liburals.

[Someone]

Why, oh why are people bothering to dance to Slackjaw's tune: he revives the Genitalia pit thread to wax on the great realization about jerking off sans lube...

and octopus is a voice of sanity. You know you've reached a low point.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Psst you can permabox him NOW.

I was going to defend Mr. Hump since I felt his first comment in the thread wasn't that off-kilter and the initial response was rather brusque and unnecessary. But when he immediately resumes his "you're TRIGGERED!" tropes (funny from one so easily roused) I realize how little he adds to these fora except by his absence.

You're Triggered Librul, you can't take the truth !!!!

[Someone]

Ahhh, the old Clothahump shell game.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Why, oh why are people bothering to dance to Slackjaw's tune: he revives the Genitalia pit thread to wax on the great realization about jerking off sans lube...

Damn you! I clicked on that.

[Someone]

RIP Snark.
Hello Derp v2.0

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Ahhh, the old Clothahump shell game.

We are Legion against the webtacks.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Damn you! I clicked on that.

See.

His great realization.

Important.

Dance, Durp Monkey, Dance.

He's gonna run that out 50 pages or more.

[Someone]

Well, all I can say is that I have learned a hell of a lot about various dopers' masturbation techniques.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Damn you! I clicked on that.

Bad sex for a man and bad sex for a woman tend to be kinda different. The "bad sex" I've had- was not "still pretty good!"

[Someone]

Grinches assemble in Great Debates to tell Dopers, "Don't tell your kids Santa Clause (sic) is real. They'll hate you for lying to them when they find out the truth."

https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb...d.php?t=866633

[Someone]

Seriously, from the Santa and circumcision threads it seems like a lot of middle-aged losers are casting about wildly for explanations from relatively painless childhoods as to why they didn't launch.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Bad sex for a man and bad sex for a woman tend to be kinda different. The "bad sex" I've had- was not "still pretty good!"

It says something that the circumcision obsessed great complaints are possibly missing out on Yet More Feeling and the potential for Multi-Orgasms (plus using the Secret Penis Part to drive sex dolls women wild, while also having Multi-Orgasms).

Contra FGM ... well removing the major sexual stimuli organs.

Ya know cause it's totes the same...

And God forbid the horror of possibly (maybe) having some (possible limited) reduction in sensitivity not be integrated into FGM discussions.

[Someone]

Somebody create a sock and go start a thread about gluten. It's all gluten's fault.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Somebody create a sock and go start a thread about gluten. It's all gluten's fault.

But can you masturbate with gluten?

(don't answer that)

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

But can you masturbate with gluten?

(don't answer that)

That's on a knead-to-know basis.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

But can you masturbate with gluten?

(don't answer that)

Only if the wheat grains were uncircumcised.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Seriously, from the Santa and circumcision threads it seems like a lot of middle-aged losers are casting about wildly for explanations from relatively painless childhoods as to why they didn't launch.

This is one of the best descriptions of the Dope I've read all year.

[Someone]

So, does anyone think that the Durp powers will ever get around to getting any help to fix the fucked up incompetently done Zottie Skin?

I'm gonna wager in about 3 years they'll convince themselves that maybe moving from a sticky pathetically admitting they've got a fucked up Skin, to replacing/fixing it.

(or let's circumcise Zotti's skin...)

(I'm sorry the management would like to apologize for that last item.)

[Someone]

In the spirit of TMI -- want to learn far more than you ever wanted to about a certain poster's favorite... images, as well as power a sustainable turbine through fingerwagging-induced winds? Then open this spoiler!

Originally Posted by Someone One great thing I will say about this board is that there is a place where you could post about how awful this is and not have to face down some morality police who would say that you shouldn't have been doing porn in the first place. I'm sure the equivalent thread on Reddit will even have that--even if though it will likely be downvoted to hell. Anyways, yeah, fuck 'em. The child porn excuse doesn't wash for the exact reasons you say. If other companies can figure out how to handle it, so can they. And the characteristics of what Tumblr is is already set in stone. If they try to become more like Facebook, the people who like Tumblr as a social media platform will abandon it. And, as long as they aren't SWERFs (sex worker exclusionary radical feminists), the Tumblr "SJWs" won't be happy, either. Live Journal is not their only competition. DeviantArt has a huge porn section. And they also allow the microblogging stuff. I like it because it's easy to find similar stuff by just clicking on the side. All they do is have an age gate. Which, BTW, is how Tumblr could have handled this to avoid problems with Apple if they really were worried. Age gate the site, and don't let the app access the age-gated stuff. Gah. Sorry this affects you as a producer, BPC. If I remember correctly, some of your stuff is drawn, right? So DeviantArt might be a good place to check out. They do photos, including a specific Fetish Photos section. It does pretty much remove my last reason to go there. All creators I know have a Twitter or Facebook page. The only time I run into Tumblr anymore is when an image shows up in an image search.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

But can you masturbate with gluten?

(don't answer that)

What is the gluten content of pan-fried semen? (Asking for a friend)

[Someone]

From a circumcised or uncircumcised male?

[Someone]

Or course any true Alpha would be uncut. All those circumcised posers are merely weak betas suffering from delusions of adequacy.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

But can you masturbate with gluten?

(don't answer that)

Only if Seitan makes you do it.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Or course any true Alpha would be uncut. All those circumcised posers are merely weak betas suffering from delusions of adequacy.

Surely the cut dudes are just jealous of Slacker's green, oily, lumpy, smeggy, pre-lubed crotch monster.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Surely the cut dudes are just jealous of Slacker's green, oily, lumpy, smeggy, pre-lubed crotch monster.

It's oily!?
Eeew.

[Someone]

Uncut dildos are cheaper then the circumcised ones. I guess the Darth Vader look is in.

Link
Def NOT work safe.

https://www.bettystoybox.com/collections/uncut-dildos

[Someone]

Why are hyoo-mons proud when someone famous comes from the same place they do?

[Someone]

Time for a round of... Guess! The! Poster!

In a recently resurrected thread originally from 2016 about a Canadian drunk driver who killed four people, three of them kids, who posted this idea for a tear-based criminal justice system:

If he wanted any sympathy, he needed to break down and cry real tears in public.

He needed to seriously cry and sob and apologize to the family and also offer some serious financial compensation to the family without being forced to do so.

If the family was too disgusted by him to accept any financial compensation, he should have arranged things so that they could name a charity and failing that, he could name a charity and give them maybe one million for each person he killed.

There was a recent story in the news about a 43 year old Jamaican flight attendant who had a wife and two kids and was convicted of smuggling about 6 pounds of cocaine into Florida. He broke down on the stand and sobbed and wept and apologized to the court. It was his first offence and his apology seemed most genuine to me. If I was the judge, I would have accepted it and perhaps I would have given him some kind of serious community service - maybe let him out during the day to work and pay his wages to the state or some Cocaine Rehab center. He didn't do anyone any good by spending two years (I think it was 2 years) in prison.

Of course, this is all predicated on the fact that he never killed anyone. Although his cocaine could have killed many people had he been successful.

[Someone]

Is manson1972 always this stupid? He started a thread in ATMB to whine about a warning he got for threadshitting in the "positive gun news" thread. He's putting on a one-man display of trolling in his ATMB thread, playing at being obtuse and asking if he should submit his posts to the mods to find out what constitutes positive news.

https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb...d.php?t=866665

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Time for a round of... Guess! The! Poster!

In a recently resurrected thread originally from 2016 about a Canadian drunk driver who killed four people, three of them kids, who posted this idea for a tear-based criminal justice system:

A bit hard to guess without a link.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

Is manson1972 always this stupid? He started a thread in ATMB to whine about a warning he got for threadshitting in the "positive gun news" thread. He's putting on a one-man display of trolling in his ATMB thread, playing at being obtuse and asking if he should submit his posts to the mods to find out what constitutes positive news.

https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb...d.php?t=866665

He's just being a passive-aggressive twit, and trolling.
...and that's speaking as someone who'd like to see Australian-style gun control in the US; I wish he'd get off my side. The gun nuts can have him.

[Someone]

Originally Posted by Someone

He's just being a passive-aggressive twit, and trolling.
...and that's speaking as someone who'd like to see Australian-style gun control in the US; I wish he'd get off my side. The gun nuts can have him.

He might not even have a side. Manson's raison d'être is to disagree. I don't think ideology or opinion matter all that much. He just wants to pick nits pointlessly until everyone following along dies of boredom.

[Someone]

Anyone know?

[Someone]

JOSH maybe? Except at least her username there suggests she has better taste in music. Hm.

[Someone]

Too prickly, and too smart. JOSH is more like a Bible-thumping Spongebob Squarepants.